jahova's stiffness 

An unwanted erection that surprises you at work, school, disney land, or any other public place. Not to be confused with a jahova's witness. (the annoying bastards that also surprise you and try to give you little bibles with pictures in them to make them more fun to look at, and not read)

Dude, i got jahova's stiffness at disney world when i got on the Peter Pan Ride.

jahova's stiffness by joe joe the circus clown November 8, 2009

jahova's witness 

The reason I own dogs

Do your job Spike! The jahova's witnesses are here again!

jahova's witness by ShaneV January 6, 2008

Jahova's Fitness 

The people in Jahova's Witness who walk around all day and ride their bikes trying to get people into their religion/exercise program.

Person A: Who are those people walking around in suits?
Person B: Oh thats Jahova's Fitness.

Jahova's Fitness by Presto_Manifesto May 11, 2011

jahova's witness protection program 

This is when a person deperstly avoids any contact with a Jahovahs witness when one (or sometimes many) approache(s)you with pamphlets and or other intrusive methods of religious conversion. These white shirt wearing mountain bike riding bible thumping extremists are often hard to get rid of. There are different degrees and extremes of this religious harassment which may have varying degrees of reaction from the victim which may include avoiding known Jahova's hot spots, getting a guard dog or relocating to an area with no forwarding address.

"Hi, do you have a moment to talk about Jesus Christ? Oh hell no, I'm in the Jahova's witness protection program how did you find me?!?

jahova's witness protection program by Toddzilla72 July 20, 2016