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A giant ass form of shit you take when eating more then at least 5 jalapenos or other spicy foods. You know those long red pepper things found in Kung Pau Chicken at panda express? These are the leading causes of Jalapeno Shits.

Not to be confused with Explosive diarrhea. This does burn like hell when it drops down your ass but it doesn't leave burn marks or parts of your ass missing.
Sorry, I can't see 2012 with you. I have a bad case of Jalapeno Shit. Maybe in 4 days when I recover?
by Shit master 58 November 30, 2009
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A more severe form of Jalapeno shit, the Jalapeno Shits are horrifically painful, burning diarrhoea that sticks to you like napalm and burns like the fires of Hell, they are the result of an over-indulgence of Mexican food, the worst attack is often the first time one consumes a copious amount of Jalapenos, symptoms of the Jalapeno Shits include:

*Not wanting to go more than a few yards from the loo
*Frequent, painful shit attacks
*Napalm-like burning diarrhoea, full of undigested Capsaicin and Jalapeno skins/seeds
*Frequent baths/showers in attack to wash the Lava-like crap from your sensitive pain receptors
*Groaning and/or weeping eyes
*Bad stomach upset
*Cursing whatever manner of cruel God decided to give a man's arse Capsaicin receptors

The only real remedy for the Jalapeno Shits is too take anti=indigestion medicine and ride it out, as well as washing your arse after each movement to give you comfort, the Capsaicin will pass, but you're in for one painful ride!
Person 1: Do you want to come out?
Person 2: No, sorry, I have the Jalapeno Shits, too much Mexican food last night, I'm in agony!
by UKIPer November 30, 2016
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