Skip to main content

Hipsterjism

The jizz from masturbation that a Hipster wipes off his stomach because he has decided that intercourse is no longer 'in'. Translation: He masturbates because he can't get a date, because he doesn't know how to talk to the opposite sex, because he is a FUCKING HIPSTER.
A: So, how was it?
B: Yeah, I wasn't really into her, anyway.
A: But you were talking to her for a while, I thought.
B: (silence)
A: So, you thought your negativity would just eat away at her sense of self worth to the point where she would consider you attractive?
B: That's how it usually works.
A: Hm. Well, what now? Hipsterjism?
B: Where's my sock?
by ChuckChaser69 August 27, 2012
mugGet the Hipsterjism mug.

Hipsterist

A proponent of hipsterism. The hipsterist is on a constant quest to find the most peculiar, cool, ugly, or avante-garde items on the face of the earth. To do so, they are willing to spend any amount of money, for they define themselves by what they consume, not by who they are.
Darren the hipsterist owns every LP ever released by Interpol. And they're all signed copies. Imports. Even the remixes.
by Noir September 6, 2005
mugGet the Hipsterist mug.

hipsterish

describing someone who is acting, dressing, talking, etc like a hipster
Josh's argument was so hipsterish
by oregongirl December 14, 2011
mugGet the hipsterish mug.

Hipsterism

Mass consumption in the eternal quest for what is cool, distinct, difficult to acquire, or just plain ugly. Hipsters engage in hipsterism by shopping at the most trendy places, always looking for the most unique items. Everything, from the type of clothes worn to what you eat is a status symbol to the hipsterist.
Darren's hipsterism had run rampant by the time he bought his 7th vintage BMW motorcycle.
by Noir September 6, 2005
mugGet the Hipsterism mug.

The Laws of Hipsterism

1) One's goal shalt always be in contradiction with one's actions (the Irony Law). The is the foundation of all ye hipsterism, and the law that binds all other laws.

2) Nothing shalt be practical, a hipster shalt do everything for appearances.

2) Finally, a hipster shalt never claim to be a hipster.
Ye Application of The Laws of Hipsterism:

#1
Normal Person: Hey you want to go shopping with me?
Hipster female: No, I don't care about how I look.

(Hipster Female shalt then traverse to ye Olde Thrift store where thou shalt spend one full half day looking for garments)

#2
Normal Person: Hey! I like this artist. Their music is good!!

(Thou buys/downloads album to listen to)

Hipster Guy: *No inner monologue, for hipsters do not think consciously for themselves.

(Thou buys Vinyl to show ye others that thou purchases Vinyls.)

#3
Hipster One: I hate hipsters.

Hipster Two: Me too! God! I'm going to write an entry in Olde English and send it into Urban Dictionary that professes my hate for hipsters!!

Hipster One: Right on dude!! Hey you want to go to the thrift store afterwords to go buy records?

Hipster Two: Sorry man, but I can't I'll be pretty busy writing that entry and my fixed gear bike's in the shop right now.

Hipster One: It's cool dude...I...I love you.

Hipster Two: I...I love you too.
________________________________________________

THESE ARE THE RULES TO BE SPREAD FAR ABOVE THE SKY AND ACROSS THE LAND: FOREVER AND EARNESTLY, UN-IRONICALLY AND FOR THE GOOD OF MANKIND!!!
by smellls November 6, 2011
mugGet the The Laws of Hipsterism mug.

Hipstergasm

The pure exuberance when a hipster makes a new hipster discovery. Whether this is a new way to grow an ironic beard, a thrift store that sells corn cobb pipes or an unreleased 45 by vampire weekend.
Iver discovered a new thrift store and had a total hipstergasm when he found the motherload of v-neck shirts, skinny corduroys and polyester scarfs.
by Atomic Fist Bumps April 17, 2012
mugGet the Hipstergasm mug.

Hipsterism

Ironic Nostalgia; the creed that "everything old and belonging to an era is cool (besides anything too old, like classical music), but only when worn/eaten/done in an ironic fashion." Basically: ironic nostalgia.
Kurt practiced extreme hipsterism on Tuesday; pairing some ancient converse all-stars with an 80's watch, an obscure 60's band tee, and acid-washed jeans, he glared at all of us "preps" through tortoiseshell lenseless glasses.
by susan.a.real.hipster. November 28, 2009
mugGet the Hipsterism mug.

Share this definition

Sign in to vote

We'll email you a link to sign in instantly.

Or

Check your email

We sent a link to

Open your email