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n00beus Hagrid 

Rubeus Hagrid's n00bish brother who spends his days cultiv8ing pygmy squirrels at his est8 up in h0mie n00bia to exhibit at pygmy squirrel exhibitions. Expert in shanter.
Rubeus Hagrid: heyyo n00beus Hagrid wot've ye up to l8ly?
n00beus hagrid: you know, you know, just cultiv8ing some homie pygmy squirrels
Rubeus Hagrid: n0000000000b that is some shanter
Related Words
Haori hari Hagrid haaris HAFRICAN haribo hari-kari hairist hairism Haarika

Haribo Sugarfree Gummy Bears 

The best-tasting super-laxative on the fucking planet. Will efficiently evacuate any fecal matter you have had in your bowels for the past five years. WARNING: MUST BE TAKEN IN SMALL DOSES. An overdose has been known to leave a 250-pound manly-man crying on the bathroom floor. Be careful.
Constipated Man: Hey, I'm plugged up. Can I get some Haribo Sugarfree Gummy Bears?

His Buddy: Yeah, here's a bag. Don't forget to only have a few.

Constipated Man: (Proceeds to eat entire 8-ounce bag)

TWO HOURS LATER

Constipated Man: (Laying on the floor crying) OMFG SATAN OPENED A PORTAL TO HELL IN MY ASS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The Instant Hagrid 

Applying superglue to your face before going down on some hairy gash, once removed there lie a glorious beard.
She had such poor personal upkeep that I gave her The Instant Hagrid

I was so appreciative that she didn't shave, because I could achieve The Instant Hagrid

Hariboner 

An erection that has arisen whilst enjoying the pleasures of haribo.
Dude, this haribo is so tasty.
Yeah man, i can see you're getting a hariboner.
Hariboner by sammm-! April 15, 2009

Raped by Hagrid 

When one has such a huge shit it feels like you've just had anal sex with Hagrid for four hours straight.
Sam: Oi Cameron I got Raped by Hagrid yesterday.
Cameron: Damn how long have you held that one in?
Raped by Hagrid by headbanger-69 February 8, 2015

Hairicane 

When your hair is as crazy as a hurricane, refers especially to the hair of teachers or older women
Janet's hair is a mess!
I know, she's having a Hairicane today