A small mountain town in the western slopes of Colorado that is covered in snow 7 months of the year, and 70 degrees and sunny the rest of the year. It'
s neighboring town is Crested Butte (famous for hosting the X-Games once, and being the home of Heidi Montag, the
bitch from the Hills).
The population is somewhere around 6000, not including the
college, Western State. Gunnison also has what the locals claim is the world's smallest Wal-Mart, with no
food, except a candy aisle, milk, and soda. Sometimes you might spot Tony Hawk, or other celebrities that have million dollar houses they stay in once a year.
The population is 99% white, the other 1% is a Native American tribe from Mexico called the Cora, who don't like white people at all and have nothing to do with them. This has caused them to "keep it in the
family". Inbreeding has caused them to have very round, alien-like faces, and they are even shorter than the average
Mexican.
There's a ton of weed here, and it's practically free. Anytime you are near the high school or the
college, just whisper "weed" into the wind. 45 people
will grin at you, one
will eventually come up to you and ask if you wanna be smoked down. These are all middle to upper middle class white kids, who have never seen violence in their lives, so they aren't going to kidnap or rape you. They
will invite you to their
car, you'll hotbox the motherfucker, and they won't even ask you to put in on it. No need to worry about cops, their kids smoke too.
Steve: Man, I love living in the Gunnison Valley. The bud is
dank, and the mountains are
beautiful. Aren't you glad you live here instead of still living in Texas?
Alan: I don't know dude... don't you sometimes wish you lived in a somewhat normal place? Where there was diversity, and more to the culture than rich trust fund babies that think they're hippies?
Steve:*face of deep though*......nah...fuck it. Who needs that
shit when you have unlimited weed, slopes to hit every weekend, and...what else do we have here?
Alan: That about sums it up...but damn you weren't lying when you said this
shit was the chronic! *cough*cough*smile*cough*
So
go visit the slopes today, nigga! (Unless you really are a nigga....you
will probably feel uncomfortable around these crazy fucking white people).
