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Failzard

A small, mild mannered lizard that becomes angry and aggressive when in the presence of failure. Typically attracted to live music in the southeast region of the U.S., Failzard can appear anywhere, anytime, and for any number of reasons. If you suck, you can be sure he's watching, and rest assured he'll let you know it.

History:

Failzard was first encountered in Tampa, Florida, at a storage facility frequented by musicians. Apparently irritated by the sound of some sub-par music, this extremely intelligent reptile made it's way up to the 2nd floor of a completely secure building, and into a storage unit where a local rock band was playing. It then tried to intimidate several band members in an attempt to get them to stop playing.

When they realized what was happening, the 5 piece band changed songs and saw something amazing - the lizard suddenly relaxed, exposed his large red neck, and started bobbing his head in time with the beat! They then reverted back to the first song and the lizard started charging them again. Clearly this normally docile reptile had an ear for music, and an attitude to go with it!

Since that time, Failzard has appeared at many fails, and has been sighted all across the Tampa Bay area.

If you'd like to become a fan you can find Failzard on Myspace and Facebook.
When Failzard appeared, little Carolyn stopped in the middle of her act, realizing she had lost the talent show.
by Failzard May 8, 2010
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failtarded

Something that is so bad that two words indicating how bad it is have to be combined together.

An item, person, or event that fails so hard that calling it retarded would be a complement.
Last night's party was fucking failtarded. There was one girl, she was fat, and some dude grabbed my butt. Not to mention someone ran off with a bottle of Goose.
by mvolfman December 13, 2010
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Related Words

failtard

A person who repeatedly uses the internet-meme-turned-slang phrase "fail" to describe any number of barely applicable situations, in a weak attempt to boost their geek cred.
Waldo: "You did what? Fail!"
Ralph: "Quit being such a failtard, Waldo. Go back to 4chan where you belong."
by albedosMom669 January 13, 2009
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FailHard

The act of trying something epic and hoping for the best possible outcome only to fail in an incredibly dramatic fashion.
John tried to do a keg stand but fell and busted his face. What a failhard.
by AbeForeSkin January 24, 2018
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Failtard

Someone or something who is both an epic failure and a complete fucking retard. This person or thing has no ammbition in life other than to piss people the hell off.
Chris: OMG that MisterJenkins is on the dam forums again.
Ian: Ahh man, that guy's a fucking failtard!
Chris: I'm gonna delete the motherfucker's posts.
Ian: Pwned!
by Azayles May 6, 2008
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Failtard

A word derived from fail.

Simply put, it means that the person it was directed to is fail, and also a retard hence failtard.

It is usually used when someone says something that is utter fail and is also retarded.
Person One: OMFGBBQROX, did you see that?

Person Two: *sigh* Fucking failtard.
by Andiie January 12, 2010
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Failtard

Someone who fails at everything and can never succeed at one thing. Creating mindless threads insulting another human being. Having one person say a fragment with no idea of what a fragment is.
MisterJenkins is a failtard.
by The-Phenom14 May 6, 2008
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