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Elberton

Elberton, Georgia. Granite Capital of the World, a small town located in north GA near the SC border. Population 5,000ish. Isolated from interstates, many daydream about leading a glamourous life elsewhere when they graduate. You can drive across town in under 5 minutes if the green lights are with you.

Any shopping to be done beyond a grocery store or Walmart tends to happen in Athens or Atlanta, GA or Anderson, SC. The high school football stadium is one of the most unique in the country seating 20,000 on huge granite blocks. The high school mascot is the Blue Devil.

A quiet town where gossip travels fast, but there are wonderful, lifelong friends to be made. Many families live in the town for generations.

The Richard B. Russell hydroelectric dam on the Savannah River is a point of pride & there are many beautiful scenic areas for outdoor recreation. There are many fast food restaurants, but nice, sit-down establishments tend to struggle in this market. The churches are an important part of the social life as are numerous small businesses. Real estate is cheaper in Elberton, but turnover is correlated to the lower number of buyers. Occasionally, you can feel the ground shake if you are near a quarry when it is blasting out new blocks of granite.

You'll likely develop an appreciation for the peaceful, slower way of life in Elberton.

Another town of the same name is found in the state of Washington.
They drove to Atlanta to look for prom dresses because Elberton didn't have any.

Gee frickin' whiz, I knew I should've made that phone call back when I was passing through Athens, because coverage sucks around Elberton!

Did you know that Old Dan Tucker in that folk song was from Elberton?

Come to the football game at the Granite Bowl in Elberton Friday night; it will be fun!

Elberton is the real Granite Capital of the World even though New Hampshire tries to claim that honor too.

Elberton has one four lane highway, but confused outsiders tend to define it as a five lane due to the presence of the center turning lane.

No matter how far young folks roam outside of Elberton, most tend to like coming back to visit their hometown from time to time.

Do you think there will ever be a viable sit-down restaurant in the old "Cattletown"/"Gardens" building in Elberton?
by Hip Mama February 6, 2010
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Jeremy Elbertson

Jeremy Elbertson (born on hobbit day) is a Homunculus who often goes by the name “Jerma985”.
I heard that Jeremy Elbertson guy ZERKED OFF in front of the entire human race on stream!!?!!??!
by The-Red-Thing November 8, 2021
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elberto

Elberto is a man who is a really good guy as a father. Most elbertos have big penises and tower dominance in the sheets.
Ooh Elberto, ready for round 100,000,0089?
You know it, giggity giggity goo!
by The Jet was Taken February 17, 2021
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Joanne Emberton

A term to describe a drug addicted mother who cares little for her kids.
Have you seen how she treats her kids, she's a real Joanne Emberton
by --English--Muffin-- June 20, 2019
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Tyler Ellerton

Badass and legend. There are stories of him killing an entire ISIS camp with a pencil and surviving three weeks in Antarctica with no clothes. Not just strong but also very smart winning the noble prize 20 times in a row. But he is generous and has gave the runner up his award. He is also an legendary athlete and is said to been the inspiration for Messi and Ronaldo. Once a kid was getting bullied and Tyler gave the kid some advice and a signed shirt. That kid is now Kylian Mpabbe. Overall legend and the greatest thing to exist since the word nigger.
Tyler ellerton
by Sjjehrhshaotks June 15, 2019
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emberton

“Figets in his sleep” really just wanking

Also used for the term of bed flipping
Don’t do an Emberton tonight
by Room mate November 13, 2017
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Elkerton Sign

Refers to the bruising of of the soft-palate after performing fellacio.
Me: Why does my mouth hurt so much?

A medical professional: Oh you have the Elkerton Sign. Looks like you had a fun night!
by MagicalMan111 December 16, 2022
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