Cohnjoffeitis 

Noun.
A devastating mental and physical condition that causes the victim to have a miniature, useless, pancreas resembling a raisin, to become rather scrawny, and constantly reference and quote internet memes. It is genetic and the only soothing action is talking about the condition all the time.

"You were born with the burden of cohnjoffeitis? Oh, you poor soul!"

Cohnjoffeitis by @Mr.Toashty March 2, 2017