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COUCH DAY

The day of hell after a particularly heavy night of drinking. The resulting hangover is so bad that you are forced to stay on your couch all day to recouperate.
Ingredients for setting up your very own COUCH DAY:
1. A long shower.
2. A gallon of cold water.
3. Half a loaf of white bread from your nearest dining hall or supermarket.
4. A confortable couch in a cool, dark room.
5. Suitably mellow music by the singer/songwriter du jour.
6. Tylenol or Advil.
7. Your phone.
Instructions:
1. Crawl to the shower and stay there as long as possible. 2. Do not allow yourself to sit in the shower, as people piss in there all the time.
3. Put a shitload of water in your fridge.
4. Have a sympathizer get you half a loaf of white bread.
5. Turn on the John Mayer / Jason Mraz / Howie Day.
6. Take the Tylenol or Advil and retire to your couch.
7. Eat the bread and sip on your cold water.
8. Stay put. Sudden movement will make you toss up the bread you've been munching on.
9. Using your phone, call everyone you know and describe how horrible you are feeling and swear to them that you are never drinking again.
10. Reconstruct the events of the evening that led to your COUCH DAY.
11. Avoid bright light at all times.
Oh man, I feel like ass, I shouldn't have drank that boxed wine last night. Today is gonna be a COUCH DAY.
by Brad d May 21, 2006
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Noodles-on-the-Couch Day

One of those days where you don't feel like doing anything so you just sit on the couch and eat Ramen Noodles all day
Friend: You good man?
Me: Nah. I've been having a Noodles-on-the-Couch Day since I woke up.
by Fergie03 December 31, 2020
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a sentence no one has ever uttered except me. why i have ever thought of this is beyond me. help me. help us. you are the only other person to ever see this. except for the poor soul who reviews this.

also nice dick bro
it wont

your balls smell like my grandma on the 764th day of watching the first superbowl on a red couch
by Random schoolkid June 26, 2021
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Can’t trust you no more coach day

Can’t trust you coach no more day. the day when you suspect something suspicious someone
did you hear that today is I can’t trust you no more coach day
by gremlin 999 October 29, 2019
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You get to request an open legged vagina pic from anyone and the must send it
You: "hey it's may 2nd national cooch pic day"
Friend: "bro I'm your Grandma I ain't sending you that"
You: "I didn't ask?"
by James_2000 May 2, 2024
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Day care kenel cough

Children picking up illness from other children.
Children picking up illnesses from other children and taking that cough or cold home to the parents. Honey, it seems like we have been constantly sick ever since we enrolled junior into day care. I know junior is sick today, but we both have to work, just send him in! And the vicious circle of "Day care kenel cough continues"!
by A Big Bad Boy October 16, 2011
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Coach Dayon

Vince Lombardi was good and all but he was no Coach Dayon...
by TommyLee8 July 12, 2021
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