Bud Wiseman
This gent' becomes extremely wise after he's consumed some beer (such as bud), and starts to philosophise, give advice, etc.
(1)
BUD WISEMAN: You know, you guys are the most important thing to me, you know? I mean, what is more important than friends and friendship, man? I mean, you could be super rich dude, but if you don't have any friends -- what good is it?
(2)
BUD WISEMAN: Look Mike, I'm sorry your fiance died dude, but shit happens -- you know what I mean? There's a reason, you know? It was meant to be. It's all part of God's plan. No, you and I don't know why, but, you'll understand when you get to Heaven, bro'. But, right now, you need to heal, to move on, man. You need to get laid ASAP!
(3)
BUD WISEMAN: God! What am I doing here? I'm drunk at a strip bar on a Sunday! Please forgive me God! Come on, you guys, let's get out of here. It's all about JESUS dudes. We need to straighten up; Jesus is coming back soon, you know? And besides, any one of us could die at any time, man. Like tonight even. You gotta live every day like it's your last, man.
YOU: Damn! You're absolutely right bro'. I'm gonna see how many of these strippers I can take home and fuck tonight!
BUD WISEMAN: You know, you guys are the most important thing to me, you know? I mean, what is more important than friends and friendship, man? I mean, you could be super rich dude, but if you don't have any friends -- what good is it?
(2)
BUD WISEMAN: Look Mike, I'm sorry your fiance died dude, but shit happens -- you know what I mean? There's a reason, you know? It was meant to be. It's all part of God's plan. No, you and I don't know why, but, you'll understand when you get to Heaven, bro'. But, right now, you need to heal, to move on, man. You need to get laid ASAP!
(3)
BUD WISEMAN: God! What am I doing here? I'm drunk at a strip bar on a Sunday! Please forgive me God! Come on, you guys, let's get out of here. It's all about JESUS dudes. We need to straighten up; Jesus is coming back soon, you know? And besides, any one of us could die at any time, man. Like tonight even. You gotta live every day like it's your last, man.
YOU: Damn! You're absolutely right bro'. I'm gonna see how many of these strippers I can take home and fuck tonight!
Bud Wiseman by Dick Busch May 31, 2006
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