Asphyxicrank 

A variation on the age old hobby of masturbation, an aspyxicrank essentially involves the masturbator using one hand to clutch at his throat whilst using the other hand to engage in aformentioned dick-strokage. During all of this, the user will be crying.

Without the strangulation, this would simply be a crank, something fairly hard tio achieve, due to the conflict of emotions in play.

Other variations include the danger crank, the reverse danger crank, and of course the the reverse danger asphyxicrank.

Damn, Pash dropped some acid and we just caught him having an asphyxicrank in his room. He was reading Birdsong.

Asphyxicrank by Danger Crank August 19, 2008

asphyxiwank 

noun & verb. The act of asphyxiating oneself close to death whilst masturbating for the thrill of it. A fetish that can sometimes go a little too far by accident, leading to death.

Derived from "asphyxsia" and "wank" (British term)

The Conservatives cannot effectively comment on corruption, since they became the party of cash-for-questions, the extramarital affair and the fatal asphyxiwank

asphyxiwank by Dijital-JB May 17, 2006

asphyxiwanker

A Tottenham fan...because they like to choke at the vital point....

We knew who he supported he was a asphyxiwanker...

asphyxiwanker by Westhamdickie May 29, 2016

asphyxicake 

The act of suffocating oneself with a sufficient quantity of cake frosting. (Cake optional.)

The scheduling for this project is so absurd, I don't know what to do other than asphyxicake myself.

asphyxicake by fdfdcfdfdfictifire August 13, 2019