Taking you, the one male in all of this, and 20 females. You should all be high school students trying to lose your virginity. After school go to the stairwell and line up, then make it to second base with all of the in less then ten minutes. Go home on the bus, wait till the weekend, and invite all twenty women over to your house after your parents have left on a trip. Get at least seven leather whips (everyone should have memorized "Fifty Shades of Grey" previously to the weekend). When the women arrive, turn on a playlist of Ke$ha's greatest hits and fill a small swimming pool full of vodka (in your living room, of course). Invite the women into the pool to sanitize them, and then have them drink the entire amount of vodka. Throw the whips away because it would be some creepy shit if you actually used them. Finally, while the music plays, proceed to fourth base with all women and be sure to last at least 48 hours or at least until your parents return and are able to state, to the world record keepers, that you have had sex for the longest amount of time in history. Buy the new record book when you are done, a copy for each of the twenty women and you, present the book at school on Monday, becoming one of the cool kids, and pray to God you don't become a baby daddy after that weekend.
by The Greatest: MM February 21, 2015
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