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Chicago Bears Tax

A mysterious curse where any football player who signs with the Chicago Bears immediately forgets how to play football. Scientists estimate a 75% drop in skill the second the pen hits the contract. Side effects include dropped passes, missed tackles, and uncontrollable crying at Soldier Field.
Man, he was a Pro Bowler last year. Now? Looks like he paid the Chicago Bears Tax.
by 34344444 September 7, 2025
mugGet the Chicago Bears Taxmug.

Chicago bears

A more entertaining football club than the New Orleans Saints (even if they lost the game).
The goody two shoes Saints were crying about cheap shots after getting hit twice by the Chicago Bears. A saint just doesn't have the same effect on an opponent as a bear, a player pulling out a crucifix and telling an opponent they will burn in hell for what they did doesnt have the same effect on somebody as hitting them twice, even if they were sucker punches in the helmet.
by Solid Mantis November 3, 2020
mugGet the Chicago bearsmug.

Chicago bears

A more entertaining football club than the New Orleans Saints (even if they lost the game).
The Saints were crying about cheap shots after getting hit twice by the Chicago Bears. A saint just doesn't have the same effect on an opponent as a bear, a player pulling out a crucifix and telling an opponent they will burn in hell for what they did doesnt have the same effect on somebody as hitting them twice, even if they were sucker punches in the helmet.
by Solid Mantis November 3, 2020
mugGet the Chicago bearsmug.

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