This common turn of phrase is usually used to mock someone who is injured in a funny way
"Did you hear Chase Garbers broke his wrist while fingering a vagina?"

"You are what you get injured by, and I always knew that Brahmas QB was a pussy"
by Smartest Man in History May 25, 2024
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Injured Snail

For those of us who are spectacularly slow - both physically and/or mentally (god help you if you're both!)

So not just a snail (renowned for their lack of speed) but one going slower than normal due to injury. Which is pretty slow.


Urmmm - I'm feeling a bit of an injured snail now, so bear with me...

Ok here we go.

A: "You know, they've taken gullible out of the dictionary?"

B: "Really! Woah!"

A: laughs.

B: what? (thinks desperately for a few mins) Oh I get it! I've been gullible! Ha ha!

A: "blimey you're quick aren't you?"

B: Really!

A: "No. You've got the mental pace of an injured snail!"
by Remakulingo March 10, 2009
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Injured Peacock

The person, or people, in the office who, like a literally injured peacock, make a lot of noise and ruffle alllll their feathers (and yours too) to give the illusion of being ~super~ productive, but actually achieving fuck all.
Person 1: Wow, that Dale has been racing about on the phone all day! He looks super busy!
Person 2: Um no, he's an Injured Peacock; making all the noise and flapping about the place but not actually doing anything.
by Suburban_mo May 23, 2016
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