pi day

(March 14th)
A holiday celebrated by math teachers and geeks everywhere.
March 14th was the chosen day because pi = 3.14.
Since the next three numbers in the sequence are 159, at 1:59, everyone celebrating must say, "Happy Pi Day!"
And please, don't ask how I know.

J0HNNY: Oh my God! It's 1:59! Happy Pi Day!!
GEEK F0LL0WERS: Happy Pi Day!!!
J0CK: WTF?? Where's the pie?
H0HNNY && GEEK F0LL0WERS: Hahaha! Silly dumb kid!

by love x me <33333333333 March 17, 2007

Murder by Pi

When a gifted child’s Xmas wish for Santa Claus is to be rewarded with the last digit of the number π, which prompted the Donor-in-Chief to commit a “mathematical crime,” because he couldn’t fulfill the child’s “Christmaths” wish.

A few billion children worldwide would miss their Christmas gift this year, because Father Christmas had been charged for murder by pi—he’d first be spending the twelve days of Christmas behind bars before being flown to a North Korean or Siberian prison.

by Fasters April 18, 2022

Pi Sutra

The mathematical equivalent of “Kama Sutra” that even those who are apathetic about or allergic to the number π want to order a copy or two, after it became the post-pandemic bestselling pop math title on Amazon.

Although “Pi Sutra” is filled with juicy pi factoids, reveals some creative ways of making the irrational number exciting even to math-anxious folks, and discuses some easy-to-understand cool theorems on mathematicians’ constant of choice, however, some ultra-MAGA parents have asked their governors to ban the recreational math book in school libraries, because it’s the potential to pervert the minds of teenagers.

by Fasters September 27, 2022

Pi Social

When someone’s attempt to register to “Truth Social”—the Pinocchio-in-Chief’s app, which was launched on Presidents' Day, but has since been plagued by manifold problems—is being placed at number 3,141,592 on the waiting list.

A diehard “fine” Patriot, who is presently waiting for his trial for taking part in the January 6 riot on Capitol Hill, figured out that by the time his pi social (#3,141,592) turned to #0, when he’d actually be able to read his boss’s “truths,” either the Liar-in-Chief would be President again or the Pharisee-in-Chief might be behind bars.

by Covido April 3, 2022

As Deadly as Pi

When Pi, the life-threatening Covid-19 variant of concern that came after the variant Omicron, was marginalized by WHO, as it fears that the politically incorrect or mathematically blasphemous label might unprovenly trigger a global outcry or protest among millions of math educators for whatever unspoken or irrational reasons.

From 2020–2023, many different types of Covid-19 variants were floating freely on the planet, but none was as deadly as Pi.

by Fasters May 23, 2023

Pi Calling

When math geeks could experience a deeper relationship with mathematics’s most beloved constant, as they delight in her presence, who is more than willing to reveal more of her numerical or geometric secrets to those who seek her with all their heart, mind, and soul.

Like Jesus, Pi calling. Why not enjoy peace in her transcendental presence?

by Fasters December 12, 2022

Pi-Pod

A state of the art, compact, portable electronic device with an LCD display, capable of carrying out complex mathematical calculations.

A calculator.

What's the area of a circle with a 5cm radius? Dammit, why didn't I upload the pi-calculator app to my ipod 5 GTi?

Don't worry, we can check the answer on my Pi-Pod.

*blows dust off calculator*

by jwgrooves January 4, 2012