John Key

The act of pulling on a girl's ponytail

"You better put that hair in a bun or imma John Key yo ass"

by Jacinda Arden November 30, 2021

John Key

New Zealand rhyming slang for Donkey Punch, similar to the Wolf Bag technique and named after the Prime Minister who won the country's trust through his seeming mild-mannered ineptness, allowing him to take them from behind and smack them in the head. Typically, only the person delivering a John Key benefits, while the person receiving a John Key suffers immensely and risks permanent brain drain. It is the sly con and false pretenses of a John Key that distinguishes it from a standard Donkey Punch or Wolf Bag.

New Zealand was so loose, even John Key barely got a reaction from them.

by Red Hood November 29, 2012

John Key

1. Prime Minister of New Zealand

2. The last fart before a shit

I better go take a dump, I just had a meeting with John Key

by odinn svenson October 8, 2015