captain condom

A person who's father should have used a condom. Or defiantly should have pulled out.

Joe is such a captain condom. I bet his father wished he used one .

by Broutiful August 22, 2016

Captain's Pass

1. When someone tells you about something they have done that they think is impressive, but it has the total opposite effect.
2. When someone is bragging about an absolute epic fail, and they should definitely keep it to themself.

Example 1.)
Guy: I know I have bad teeth, so I bough this teeth-repairing toothpaste called Sensodyne.
Me: Congrats bro, you get the Captain's Pass!

Example 2.)
Guy: I was a father at 16, and now I'm blessed to be a young grandpa at 32.
Me: Congrats bro, you get the Captain's Pass!

by mbrewer32 July 4, 2016

Captain Ron

When your partner closes an eye and you take a dump on said eye leaving your partner with a Captain Ron eye patch circa 1980s.

I felt like I could take on the Kreaken while riding Johnny Depp's back after my old lady gave me that stunning Captain Ron!

by ArgggMatey July 14, 2016

Captain Flex

Dude with a slim build who sees himself as more of a Scottiah adonis body god
Usually found peacocking around the floor for no reason
Throws out a random flex when a member of the opposite sex is around

Look at BB over there peacocking round those hoes, he is the real deal captain flex

by Jonsnowknowsnowt July 27, 2016

Captain Flex

Dude with a slim build who sees himself as more of a Scottiah adonis body god
Usually found peacocking around the floor for no reason
Throws out a random flex when a member of the opposite sex is around

Look at BB over there peacocking round those hoes, he is the real deal captain flex

by Jonsnowknowsnowt July 27, 2016

Captain Flex

Dude with a slim build who sees himself as more of a Scottiah adonis body god
Usually found peacocking around the floor for no reason
Throws out a random flex when a member of the opposite sex is around

Look at BB over there peacocking round those hoes, he is the real deal captain flex

by Jonsnowknowsnowt July 27, 2016

Captain Flex

Dude with a slim build who sees himself as more of a Scottiah adonis body god
Usually found peacocking around the floor for no reason
Throws out a random flex when a member of the opposite sex is around

Look at BB over there peacocking round those hoes, he is the real deal captain flex

by Jonsnowknowsnowt July 27, 2016