*i go to the school library and walk up to the dictionary of the entire
english language that they have sitting out in the open.
i browse the pages until i see that word, the word that fills me with so much hatred and anger, "pun." i don't hesitate to whip out the black sharpie that i brought with me just for this occasion. furiously, i scribble out that awful, disgusting word and replace it with my own word. a much better word. "pow."*
~LATER~
*i hear the teacher call my name. when i look up, she tells me that i've been summoned to the principals office. i stand up and ask, "do i need to bring my backpack?" to which she responds that i don't. i walk out the door, flipping through the files in my brain, trying to figure out why i was being called to the principal's office. i had done nothing wrong! by the time i made my way to the principal's office i still had not figured it out.
carefully, i knocked on the door and was told to come in. so i opened the door and entered the office. the principal looks at me, "take a seat." i sit down. "do you know why you're here?" i shake my head. he sighs, " it seems you have replaced the word 'pun' in our
english dictionary with 'pow.' do you have any explanation for this?" what? i thought everybody knew! i proceed to explain exactly why pow was better than pun. the principal looks at me, seemingly startled. he laughs and agrees that pow is a much better word. then he called the
president of the united states to replace pun with pow.*
