3 definitions by jack kane
Huey Long, the Kingfish of Louisiana, Governor and Senator, was a populist politician in 1920s and 1930s. As Governor in the late '20s, and as Senator afterwards, Long's charisma and accomplishments made him a presidential candidate for the 1936 elections. FDR called Huey Long one of the two most dangerous men in America. Senator Long's was gunned down in 1935. His last words were: “God, don't let me die. I have so much to do.”
As governor, Long: built roads across the state; built bridges; built hospitals; expanded the LSU from a minor provincial college to a major national university; promoted adult illiteracy; abolished the poll tax; provided free textbooks to the children of Louisiana; greeted a German admiral in his pajamas; continuously fought Standard Oil; defeated an impeachment attempt by the Lousiana oligarchy; built the tallest state Capitol building in the South; pissed off the Louisiana aristocratic and moneyed elite something awful; and more.
As a Senator, Long promoted his 'Share the Wealth' program - which proposed the radical decrease of income inequality in the United States.
Many have called Long a dictator. Long ruled by guile and acumen, but mostly Huey ruled because the people liked him. The people voted for Huey again and again.
Regarding violence: Long avoided serice in WW1; he famously said he'd rather not rule than rule by murder.
In 1935 a plot of the Louisiana oligarchy led to Long's death.
(Also check T. Harry William's "Huey Long".)
As governor, Long: built roads across the state; built bridges; built hospitals; expanded the LSU from a minor provincial college to a major national university; promoted adult illiteracy; abolished the poll tax; provided free textbooks to the children of Louisiana; greeted a German admiral in his pajamas; continuously fought Standard Oil; defeated an impeachment attempt by the Lousiana oligarchy; built the tallest state Capitol building in the South; pissed off the Louisiana aristocratic and moneyed elite something awful; and more.
As a Senator, Long promoted his 'Share the Wealth' program - which proposed the radical decrease of income inequality in the United States.
Many have called Long a dictator. Long ruled by guile and acumen, but mostly Huey ruled because the people liked him. The people voted for Huey again and again.
Regarding violence: Long avoided serice in WW1; he famously said he'd rather not rule than rule by murder.
In 1935 a plot of the Louisiana oligarchy led to Long's death.
(Also check T. Harry William's "Huey Long".)
(From Randy Newman's song about Huey Long:)
Who built the highway to Baton Rouge?
Who put up the hospital and built you schools?
Who looks after shit-kickers like you?
The Kingfish do
Who gave a party at the Roosevelt Hotel?
And invited the whole north half of the state down there for free
The people in the city
Had their eyes bugging out
Cause everyone of you
Looked just like me
Kingfish, Kingfish
Everybody sing
Kingfish, Kingfish
Every man a king
Who took on the Standard Oil men
And whipped their ass
Just like he promised he'd do?
Ain't no Standard Oil men gonna run this state
Gonna be run by little folks like me and you
Kingfish, Kingfish
Friend of the working man
Kingfish, Kingfish
The Kingfish gonna save this land
Who built the highway to Baton Rouge?
Who put up the hospital and built you schools?
Who looks after shit-kickers like you?
The Kingfish do
Who gave a party at the Roosevelt Hotel?
And invited the whole north half of the state down there for free
The people in the city
Had their eyes bugging out
Cause everyone of you
Looked just like me
Kingfish, Kingfish
Everybody sing
Kingfish, Kingfish
Every man a king
Who took on the Standard Oil men
And whipped their ass
Just like he promised he'd do?
Ain't no Standard Oil men gonna run this state
Gonna be run by little folks like me and you
Kingfish, Kingfish
Friend of the working man
Kingfish, Kingfish
The Kingfish gonna save this land
by jack kane January 21, 2011
Limbo; purgatory; a place where you waste the best years of your life apprenticing for the PhD guild.
THE BAD:
- endless homework
- potentially asshole professors
- little social life
- boring repetitive classes
- dull TA work
- shit pay
- you might end up in the middle of nowhere
- constant moving massacres relationships. Remember the girlfriend who left you because she couldn't take the long-distance relationship? Your friends? The family you see for 2 weeks per year? Better forget them... Easier that way.
- having to teach obscenely hot 18 year olds without being able to touch them
- leads to frigidity and involuntary abstinence
- it's 4am. You went to class between 9 and 12. You ate pretzels for lunch, then you graded for 4 hours. Then you wrote homework. Now your eyes are bleeding and you have the urge to cut.
- once (if) you graduate, you have to move again, in order go to post-doc, which is the same as grad school except you get a few bucks more and you write fewer pages of homework
- incipient alcoholism
THE GOOD:
- incipient alcoholism
- easy ticket to the first world for talented third worlders
- easy ticket to a big city if you luck out
- you can really slack away if you play your cards right
- 3+ months of vacation
- sort of intellectual
- beats the fucking 9 to 5. You're making 40K working 40 hours a week with 2 weeks vacation? In grad school people can make ~20K with ~10 hours of work per week and 3 months vacation. You do the math.
THE BAD:
- endless homework
- potentially asshole professors
- little social life
- boring repetitive classes
- dull TA work
- shit pay
- you might end up in the middle of nowhere
- constant moving massacres relationships. Remember the girlfriend who left you because she couldn't take the long-distance relationship? Your friends? The family you see for 2 weeks per year? Better forget them... Easier that way.
- having to teach obscenely hot 18 year olds without being able to touch them
- leads to frigidity and involuntary abstinence
- it's 4am. You went to class between 9 and 12. You ate pretzels for lunch, then you graded for 4 hours. Then you wrote homework. Now your eyes are bleeding and you have the urge to cut.
- once (if) you graduate, you have to move again, in order go to post-doc, which is the same as grad school except you get a few bucks more and you write fewer pages of homework
- incipient alcoholism
THE GOOD:
- incipient alcoholism
- easy ticket to the first world for talented third worlders
- easy ticket to a big city if you luck out
- you can really slack away if you play your cards right
- 3+ months of vacation
- sort of intellectual
- beats the fucking 9 to 5. You're making 40K working 40 hours a week with 2 weeks vacation? In grad school people can make ~20K with ~10 hours of work per week and 3 months vacation. You do the math.
I decided to go to grad school... Sure, I don't have a girlfriend... Or a car... And my friends from my old city have all but forgotten me... And I write 40 pages of homework per week... And the hot students I teach are driving me insane... And the old professor fucks are raping me at every opportunity... And I'm on a first name basis with the liquor store owner... But goddamn, at least I'm not in the 9 to 5! Yesterday, Wednesday the 12th, I slept until 1pm and then I watched 3 movies, played games for 4 hours, and drank 14 beers. Tomorrow, on Friday, I'll do the same. In a month it'll be summer again and I'll fly home to see my friends and get a nice tan... I used to think about graduation, but that was 2 years ago.
Yeah...
Yeah...
by jack kane January 21, 2011
A symptom of the failure and insanity of modern society.
If there is something to do, then how can there be unemployment? There is work to do - we go do it. It's that simple.
And if there is nothing to do, can't the rich creeps just leave us alone?
No, they can't. Because unemployment was fabricated by the rich cocksuckers in order to keep wages down and keep the lower classes scared and busy. Because if you're afraid you might lose your job - which allows you to purchase tenancy/ food/ clothes from the rich - you keep your mouth shut and you keep working no matter how dumb the job is. And if the wage is shit you keep quiet because at least you're getting some dough with which to pay rent/ alimony/ student loans/ dinner.
Meanwhile we see the proliferation of computerization, robotization, mechanization, miniaturization, and other -zations - meaning there is less and less useful stuff left to do. Most work out there is bullshit. (At least) 70% of us can stop working today (everyone except the people doing real work, who incidentally are the worst paid - the farmers, the janitors, the maintenance workers, the construction workers, etc), and life will go on just fine. Except everyone will have more leisure and less worry.
But we can't have that. Oh no. The rich are just keeping us busy so we fail to notice how they are getting away with murder.
Unemployment is as dumb as planned obsolescence. The future generations will look at us with horror and derision.
If there is something to do, then how can there be unemployment? There is work to do - we go do it. It's that simple.
And if there is nothing to do, can't the rich creeps just leave us alone?
No, they can't. Because unemployment was fabricated by the rich cocksuckers in order to keep wages down and keep the lower classes scared and busy. Because if you're afraid you might lose your job - which allows you to purchase tenancy/ food/ clothes from the rich - you keep your mouth shut and you keep working no matter how dumb the job is. And if the wage is shit you keep quiet because at least you're getting some dough with which to pay rent/ alimony/ student loans/ dinner.
Meanwhile we see the proliferation of computerization, robotization, mechanization, miniaturization, and other -zations - meaning there is less and less useful stuff left to do. Most work out there is bullshit. (At least) 70% of us can stop working today (everyone except the people doing real work, who incidentally are the worst paid - the farmers, the janitors, the maintenance workers, the construction workers, etc), and life will go on just fine. Except everyone will have more leisure and less worry.
But we can't have that. Oh no. The rich are just keeping us busy so we fail to notice how they are getting away with murder.
Unemployment is as dumb as planned obsolescence. The future generations will look at us with horror and derision.
Unemployment has found Joe:
Joe: Shit, I can't find a job.
Frank: You mean you are a strong, intelligent young person who is willing to work for the benefit of the rich, and they won't even let you do that?
Joe: Yeah.
Frank: So where do you live? What do you eat?
Joe: I live in my mom's basement. I eat macaroni and sometimes I eat cheese.
Frank: How do you fill your days?
Joe: Well, I don't like fat chicks, and the hot ones think I'm a loser, and I don't have enough dough for speed and smack, so I just drink vodka all day and I masturbate to Internet porn.
Frank: You know what, man?
Joe: I know.
Frank: Fuck the rich!
Joe: Exactly.
Joe: Shit, I can't find a job.
Frank: You mean you are a strong, intelligent young person who is willing to work for the benefit of the rich, and they won't even let you do that?
Joe: Yeah.
Frank: So where do you live? What do you eat?
Joe: I live in my mom's basement. I eat macaroni and sometimes I eat cheese.
Frank: How do you fill your days?
Joe: Well, I don't like fat chicks, and the hot ones think I'm a loser, and I don't have enough dough for speed and smack, so I just drink vodka all day and I masturbate to Internet porn.
Frank: You know what, man?
Joe: I know.
Frank: Fuck the rich!
Joe: Exactly.
by jack kane January 21, 2011