2 definitions by bignordierick

Wet Wolstenholme

A dribbler who scores when the commentator least expects it. Generally experienced by a ‘penis user’ who, when attempting to finish up with a trouser snake who has other ideas, and “thinks it’s all over” only to restore his member to the chamber discovers that “it is now!” The ensuing embarrassment is evident by a substantial urine drip on whichever side the gentleman ‘dresses’.

“Awight, Gaz? Looks like you’ve ‘ad a Wet Wolstenholme on the way ahhht o’ de bogs there mate”

by bignordierick September 15, 2020

Bertie

A shit that never ends. Referential (and reverential) to the blatant admission of their own ineffectual governance in the early noughties in Ireland of Fianna Fáil. “A lot done, more to do.” A remarkable slogan for remarkable times. (Twinned with Irish Rail’s concomitant ad campaign “We’re not there yet, but we’re getting there”)

Sorry, love. I’ll be out in a minute. It’s a Bertie.

by bignordierick September 15, 2020