Definitions by Red Juan Elgordo

Under the bumper warranty 

When a woman gets that extra stitch in her hoo-ha after having a baby so that her mans slim jim will feel huge

Me: I bet that it’s like throwing a hotdog down a hallway.

Shane: No sir! She’s got that Under the bumper warranty. It’s tight.

Under the bumper warranty by Red Juan Elgordo February 17, 2024

smell my root 

When you meet a new flame and you want her to smell your root.

I was by the fire and this girl was looking to smell my root.

smell my root by Red Juan Elgordo November 20, 2022

mushroom butter 

Putting breast milk in a girls butt hole and churning it with your mushroom head until it turns to butter

I made mushroom butter on my date last night and put that shit on some toast

mushroom butter by Red Juan Elgordo November 5, 2022