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Definitions by Quadrasaurus Rex

straighten up and fly right 

If you don't straighten up and fly right, I'll have to call the police, and they'll do it for you!

Russian Candy Cane 

A used condom filled with alternating layers of period blood and male excrement--you know which one I'm talking about--which is then frozen and used as a dildo.
Guy 1: So, I heard Yuri taught Yvette how to make a Russian Candy Cane...
Guy2: What's a Russian Candy Cane?
Guy1: Take a knee, son. I'm gonna tell you a story...