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Definitions by Pikey mullet

kebab dressed as mutton 

A very ropey looking woman in mid 50s wearing clothes her teenage grandaughter would think was a little "risque"
"Jesus! look at that old slapper, kebab dressed as mutton"

newcastle screwdriver 

A heavy, usually 4 pound lump hammer
"Pass me the Newcastle screwdriver so i can smash a hole in the wall"
newcastle screwdriver by Pikey mullet September 19, 2005