A severe mental condition that normally takes hold during the early morning hours shortly after waking. The affected individual will almost immediately suffer from a shity outlook on life in general. Optirectalfecalitis(ORF) is sometimes confused with depression. One way in which to verify the condition is to make a comment about how great your life is. One of two reactions will then occur. The individual will break down into tears and whine about how crappy things are, this is classic depression. If you wake up a day later in the hospital with a concussion then you know that the individual was suffering from ORF.
The best way to approach a person with suspected Optirectalfecalitis is with a beer(preferably open). This tends to create a temporary buffer in the brain stem allowing for conversation without fear of injury.