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Definitions by Notfasava

Turtle Flirting

When you, or someone else, has to poop so bad that it’s starting to poke out and you must force it back in. This activates an uncomfortable dance while you try to get to a toilet before it’s too late.
My corgi won’t go potty until she finds the perfect spot. She’s been turtle-flirting for five minutes.

Wait, don’t start the dungeon! I gotta shit, I’ve been turtle flirting that whole time.