1 definition by Night Manager
SUV Human (pronunciation and connotation similar to subhuman) – Typically a petite insecure woman or a man experiencing vehicular compensation syndrome. They are driven by an irresistible urge to flaunt their socio-economic level (or degree of personal debt) by poorly handling incredibly large and overly expensive Sport Utility Veheicles as a display of their own self-importance or ‘status.’
However in this case SUV stands for Selfish Urban Vanity. Several deficiencies characterize almost all SUV Human behavior …
Inability to either safely brake or accelerate
Inability to park within any set of painted lines
Inability to drive with both hands (that is without a cell phone, food, make-up, etc.)
Inability to reach the pedals and see over the steering wheel simultaneously
Inability to leave any urban center and actually go ‘off-road’
Inability to perform any type maintenance or automotive repair
Inability to keep all four tires on the ground during or after an accident
Typically SUV-Humans are danger to themselves and anyone who happens to be near them in traffic. They will almost always survive any automotive accident that they cause and will feel no remorse for the fate they perpetrate upon others – ‘they should have seen me – its their fault.’
Inability to either safely brake or accelerate
Inability to park within any set of painted lines
Inability to drive with both hands (that is without a cell phone, food, make-up, etc.)
Inability to reach the pedals and see over the steering wheel simultaneously
Inability to leave any urban center and actually go ‘off-road’
Inability to perform any type maintenance or automotive repair
Inability to keep all four tires on the ground during or after an accident
Typically SUV-Humans are danger to themselves and anyone who happens to be near them in traffic. They will almost always survive any automotive accident that they cause and will feel no remorse for the fate they perpetrate upon others – ‘they should have seen me – its their fault.’
by Night Manager May 10, 2007