Chardonanus

The act of sitting on a bottle of wine and contracting the sphincter around the cork and spin until the bottle is opened.
Hey, thanks for that bottle of wine last night, it made a great chardonanus.
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King Tut Special

A sexual act in which one forciably inserts jagged grains of sand into the urtethra of their partner, preferably with the aid of a straw or ballpoint pain.
Last night at Sven's I got a brutal King Tut Special.
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