After taking a satisfyingly optimal poo, if a wipe is unnecessary or there is no lingering residue on the toilet paper, then you have successfully "Aced". If one wipe was necessary, then you received a "Birdie". Two wipes - Par. And So on and so forth. However, if you have successfully aced, you must make an A-frame above your head, like in that ridiculous song YMCA by The Village People, and shout "Ace" to the first person you see after your poo.
by Lukesmells September 14, 2013