1 definition by John Habsburg Borne Eldenbling
A game made by "hide your tacos" Miyazaki in which your goal is to escape Britain, but you only manage to do that in one of the endings. In this game you fight goobers like: the brick troll, that motherfucker outside Laurence, those two shitwhales in hamlet and the ẃ̵̟͂̃ỉ̶̪͝ͅn̵̺̈̉t ͈̮̩́̒̅e̵̺̫̹̎͌r̶̯̰̅ ̡̖̄̈́̕l̴̪̕͠a ̲̎̀͂n ̞̝͌t ͇̭̹͌̾e ̮̊r̶̟̝̊̐n ̬̼̟̔s̴̡̳̑. In the game you walk through areas like: London, hell, Dublin AND EVEN CELTIC BURIAL GROUNDS! Unlike other games bosses aren't just hard, they're a dickflattening CBT session which happens like clockwork, except the goddamn witches of hemwick, but we don't talk about them. We don't talk about Micolash either... Marry me please Micolash... Anyways, in bloodborne the goal is eating babies, their umbillical chords, injecting yourself with HIV blood, getting banished to the ninth dimension by t ̱͇̪̑h̶͓̰̖̙̪͈̀͊̓̎̾e̵̤̯͇̍ ̨̔̈̊͋̈́͘͠a̴̰͚̐̈́̋̄͘ḿ̴̨͎̹͖̫̭͂̾̚ͅy ̨̗̱͓͌̔͘g̶̼͖̈́d ̛̲͈̟͉͍̠̀͛̇͛̓̿̚ã̴̤̖̎͆͘ľ̵͍͇̳͆̍̈́̽̑̚a ̧̧̯̜̥̤͋͊̿̀͑š̴̞̠͖̪̖̲̚͝, not having sex with gerhman, not dying and last but not least... fisting pigs. Oh yeah, you can do that. After traveling to Unlondon you unlock the powerful ability to give pigs a violent prostate exam. Be sure to check out the cum dungeon for free cum.
Enlightened 1: a ̨̍š̴̬ ̞̃s̴͇͘a ̟̎i ̾͜d̶̤͛ ̼̔ĩ̴̩n̶͔͒ ̶̡̿Bloodborne .̴̲͠.̵̯̊.̵̰͗ ̡̉g ͚̍a̴͇͆i ͙̈́n ̜͊ ̴̻̊m̶̝̆o̴͉̅r ̱̏ẹ̶͒ ̵͕̑ě̵̝y̵̡̆e ̣̇s̵̬͊
Enlightened 2: Y ̡̧̧̛̮̜̤̙͓̞̱̝̱̽̊̆͋̓̿̈̀̊̊̋̿̅̔̔́͌̄̉͂̈͂̿̌͐̈́͒̅̃̈́̂̓̓̈́̾̆̀̒̃͂̿͆̎̃̀̏͊̍͋̒̍̍̎̑͘̕͘̕͠͝͠e ̛͍̲̳̱̤̮̩̯͈͕̳͎̬͆͛́͌́̍̌̀̏̂͑̂̿̓̀̋̀́͐̽̾̆̓͌͋̔̌̓́͒͋̊̋͋͐͊̍̎͋̒͋̐̕̕̚̕͘͠ͅͅs ̢̲̰͓̭͓̹͎̩̫̤̣͎̱͇̍̀̀̒̉̉͑̋͑͆̏̄̃͌̾̔̉̊̄̋̈͂̀̏͑͂́͒̏̍̋͑͘͝͝͝͝ ̛̟͙͇͈̠͈͍̭͕̰̖̯̭̱͈̬̟̮̳̳̾̾́̄̊͑̾̏̓̀͜͜ͅm ̛̛̛̛͙̱̺̥̘̜̝̘̩̥̜̙̔̆̂̍̒̄̉͊̀̐́̂͋̔̽̐͗̂̓́̎͌̇̀̾̽̈́̈̊̂̈́̂́̋̃̄͆̏̿̽̎̈́͑̏̀͑̋̿͒̒̍̿̕̚̚͘̕̕̕͝͠͝͝͠y ̨̢̡̡̨̨̛̬͕̼̠͙̦̪̖͓̼͖̬̠̞͙̳͔̯̪̯̺̞̻̙͎̟̰̮̹̙̤̭͙͙̖̖̝͊͂̏̅͒̈̄̇̀͛͂̅̽̐̿͑̾̋̾͛̇̈̇͛̀̓̽̈́̂̈́̎̒́͒͛̆̋̚̕͘̕͝͝͠͠͝ͅͅ ̛̱̝̪̜͍̬͆̏̎̾̉͌̓̈́͛͛͂̒̑́͐̄́̑̃̊̓̽̋̂̽͊̽́͒͋̽͛̀̾̀̑́̚͝m̴̢̢̡̨̡̨̧̨̗̼̼̗̠̰̗͕͕͕͕̬̮̳̥̜̮͙̲̩͙̦̭̭͕̦̰̰̲̫̩̮̤̥͇̮͖͍͓̩̘̪̤̺̟͎͍̥͙̮̯͇̗͎̗͎̜̮̗̜̐̏̓͂̿̓̇̎̄͑̓̋̓͛̍̊̂̐̏̒̊́͑̎̉̀̎̚͘͜͜͜͝ͅa ̨̡̛̱͉̯͍̬̥̙̰̱̭̻̞̪͎̱͓͕̹͉̈́͌̇̋̑̈́̅͑͂̀̉̃̋̔͂̐͂̇͆͘͜͜͠s̵̨̢̧̗̻͇̤̝͉̫̙̻̖̤͍̗̜͎͔̖̠͙̙̤̤͉̞̤͇̠͇̙̞͎͓̰̮̠̟̟͈̖̫̲̹̗̲̫̣̺͔̑̓̿͊́̈́̎̏̐̍͂̂̏̀͒̈́͛̔̅̚̚̕͜͜͠͠t ̨̛̛̛̦͚̗̻̼̹͔̙̖͔̳̠̋̀̆͂̑̉̏͗̏̈́̌̔̊̈́̀̅̾̑̑̈̀̄͒̓͌͛̀͋̈̀̒̆́̊̐̓̀̓̉͒͑̄̀̾̀͊͐̈̏͌̅̓̈̃̋̾̀̕̕̕̚͘̕͜͠͝͠ͅȩ̵̡̖̭͇͓̬͈̗̭̙̪̖͉͙͙͎̤͎̰̮̠̰̥̰͉̜̥̮̤̥̦̞͎̳̙̣̗̬̭̜̲͕͍͙͖̙̩͈̖̍́́͐̿́̈́͛͜͝ͅr ̨̨̧̢̢̢̛̛̯̹͍͈͍̲̟͎͈̠̠̞̩̩̰̱̻̲͕͕͇̗̭̪̩̞̜̰͎̰̘͚͓͙̹̪̖̳̬̠̗̲̝͈̖̥̱̟̭̥̺̝͓͕͉̻̠̖̻͊̃̀͋͐̊̿̾̀̂͆̉͐̒̾̋͂͒̐̉̄͂́̓̈́͊̐̑̀́̔̈͋̌͑̍̃͑̚͜͜͝͠ͅ. ̧̢̧̢̨̧̛̱̱̻̻̜͈͎̭͕͇̤̟̖͓̖̗̥̝̫̭̥̮̰͓͕͈̭͙͔̻̻̥̪̼͈͉̹͇͉̳̰͍̭̾̈́̔͆͋̂̃̌̄͋̑͂͐͆̈́́̋̉̈̌̃͌̓̅͂̃͂̓̀͘͘͝͠ͅͅͅ ̧̢̨̢̨̛̛̤̦͖͚̻̞̲̺̜̮͉̖͖̗͎̦̫̤̏̽͊́͂͛̓̈́̊̈̈̈́͂̋̇͐́͒̌͌͊͊̓̈́͘̕͝
Enlightened 2: Y ̡̧̧̛̮̜̤̙͓̞̱̝̱̽̊̆͋̓̿̈̀̊̊̋̿̅̔̔́͌̄̉͂̈͂̿̌͐̈́͒̅̃̈́̂̓̓̈́̾̆̀̒̃͂̿͆̎̃̀̏͊̍͋̒̍̍̎̑͘̕͘̕͠͝͠e ̛͍̲̳̱̤̮̩̯͈͕̳͎̬͆͛́͌́̍̌̀̏̂͑̂̿̓̀̋̀́͐̽̾̆̓͌͋̔̌̓́͒͋̊̋͋͐͊̍̎͋̒͋̐̕̕̚̕͘͠ͅͅs ̢̲̰͓̭͓̹͎̩̫̤̣͎̱͇̍̀̀̒̉̉͑̋͑͆̏̄̃͌̾̔̉̊̄̋̈͂̀̏͑͂́͒̏̍̋͑͘͝͝͝͝ ̛̟͙͇͈̠͈͍̭͕̰̖̯̭̱͈̬̟̮̳̳̾̾́̄̊͑̾̏̓̀͜͜ͅm ̛̛̛̛͙̱̺̥̘̜̝̘̩̥̜̙̔̆̂̍̒̄̉͊̀̐́̂͋̔̽̐͗̂̓́̎͌̇̀̾̽̈́̈̊̂̈́̂́̋̃̄͆̏̿̽̎̈́͑̏̀͑̋̿͒̒̍̿̕̚̚͘̕̕̕͝͠͝͝͠y ̨̢̡̡̨̨̛̬͕̼̠͙̦̪̖͓̼͖̬̠̞͙̳͔̯̪̯̺̞̻̙͎̟̰̮̹̙̤̭͙͙̖̖̝͊͂̏̅͒̈̄̇̀͛͂̅̽̐̿͑̾̋̾͛̇̈̇͛̀̓̽̈́̂̈́̎̒́͒͛̆̋̚̕͘̕͝͝͠͠͝ͅͅ ̛̱̝̪̜͍̬͆̏̎̾̉͌̓̈́͛͛͂̒̑́͐̄́̑̃̊̓̽̋̂̽͊̽́͒͋̽͛̀̾̀̑́̚͝m̴̢̢̡̨̡̨̧̨̗̼̼̗̠̰̗͕͕͕͕̬̮̳̥̜̮͙̲̩͙̦̭̭͕̦̰̰̲̫̩̮̤̥͇̮͖͍͓̩̘̪̤̺̟͎͍̥͙̮̯͇̗͎̗͎̜̮̗̜̐̏̓͂̿̓̇̎̄͑̓̋̓͛̍̊̂̐̏̒̊́͑̎̉̀̎̚͘͜͜͜͝ͅa ̨̡̛̱͉̯͍̬̥̙̰̱̭̻̞̪͎̱͓͕̹͉̈́͌̇̋̑̈́̅͑͂̀̉̃̋̔͂̐͂̇͆͘͜͜͠s̵̨̢̧̗̻͇̤̝͉̫̙̻̖̤͍̗̜͎͔̖̠͙̙̤̤͉̞̤͇̠͇̙̞͎͓̰̮̠̟̟͈̖̫̲̹̗̲̫̣̺͔̑̓̿͊́̈́̎̏̐̍͂̂̏̀͒̈́͛̔̅̚̚̕͜͜͠͠t ̨̛̛̛̦͚̗̻̼̹͔̙̖͔̳̠̋̀̆͂̑̉̏͗̏̈́̌̔̊̈́̀̅̾̑̑̈̀̄͒̓͌͛̀͋̈̀̒̆́̊̐̓̀̓̉͒͑̄̀̾̀͊͐̈̏͌̅̓̈̃̋̾̀̕̕̕̚͘̕͜͠͝͠ͅȩ̵̡̖̭͇͓̬͈̗̭̙̪̖͉͙͙͎̤͎̰̮̠̰̥̰͉̜̥̮̤̥̦̞͎̳̙̣̗̬̭̜̲͕͍͙͖̙̩͈̖̍́́͐̿́̈́͛͜͝ͅr ̨̨̧̢̢̢̛̛̯̹͍͈͍̲̟͎͈̠̠̞̩̩̰̱̻̲͕͕͇̗̭̪̩̞̜̰͎̰̘͚͓͙̹̪̖̳̬̠̗̲̝͈̖̥̱̟̭̥̺̝͓͕͉̻̠̖̻͊̃̀͋͐̊̿̾̀̂͆̉͐̒̾̋͂͒̐̉̄͂́̓̈́͊̐̑̀́̔̈͋̌͑̍̃͑̚͜͜͝͠ͅ. ̧̢̧̢̨̧̛̱̱̻̻̜͈͎̭͕͇̤̟̖͓̖̗̥̝̫̭̥̮̰͓͕͈̭͙͔̻̻̥̪̼͈͉̹͇͉̳̰͍̭̾̈́̔͆͋̂̃̌̄͋̑͂͐͆̈́́̋̉̈̌̃͌̓̅͂̃͂̓̀͘͘͝͠ͅͅͅ ̧̢̨̢̨̛̛̤̦͖͚̻̞̲̺̜̮͉̖͖̗͎̦̫̤̏̽͊́͂͛̓̈́̊̈̈̈́͂̋̇͐́͒̌͌͊͊̓̈́͘̕͝
by John Habsburg Borne Eldenbling May 5, 2022