1 definition by Joe Buttafuoco

A sad, lonely, pitiful and useless State that should be absorbed by Massachusetts. The State bird is heroin, and the State flower is unemployment. The State Motto is "Live, Freeze and Die". Stratford, Colebrook and Pittsburgh and home to the largest number of inbreeds in the State, and it is common to find siblings that are in active, sexual relationships with each other. If you make the mistake of not being born and raised here, or having four generations of family buried in local graves, the people will treat you like complete and utter shit.

The locals are the most arrogant, pompous douche-bags you will ever run into. They frequently troll urban dictionary just to dislike all of the negative definitions of New Hampshire. People that are from here, and smart enough to know how much is sucks, call the State "Screw Hampshire", because nothing says "you're screwed" like living in the North Country. If you have a high school diploma and half of your teeth, you're the town's most eligible bachelor. If you have a college degree and all of your teeth, you are automatically labeled as "arrogant" and no one wants anything to do with you.

A move to New Hampshire provides only the following certainties to one's future:

1. Alcoholism or other substance abuse
2. Obesity
3. Depression
4. Constant maintenance on your property and vehicle
5. Divorce if you're married / Remaining single for the rest of your life if you aren't married
Life is short, don't squander it by living in New Hampshire.
by Joe Buttafuoco July 2, 2020
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