IGKYA53's definitions

Masturbate Theater

A TV show that losers watch to beat off to low-cut Victorian corsets and fade-out sex scenes on PBS Masterpiece, formerly known as Masterpiece Theater.

Derek: Are coming down to the bar Sunday night?

Alistair: Nah, I’m gonna lay back and unzip for Jane Austen on Masturbate Theater.

by IGKYA53 July 29, 2020

Rip off your ass and hand it to you

To beat someone so bad that their ass becomes a jiggling mass of gel hanging off their spine, allowing you to rip it off and place it in their hands as they collapse into a heap of excruciating pain. After the beaten person finishes convulsing, you place their severed posterior next to their lips so that it looks like they are kissing their own ass while posting hilarious videos to social media.

You disrespect me and I'll rip off your ass and hand it to you!!!

by IGKYA53 October 2, 2020

beat you to oblivion

To savagely beat someone beyond the mere confines of life and death, to a point where an inter-dimensional portal opens up and, in a blinding maelstrom hot as a supernova, sweeps the carcass of the beaten person up into the atmosphere, breaking all known laws of physics, and leaving no trace of the beaten person behind.

Sapphire: "Get down to the store, we need some groceries."
Kingfish: "Uh, I lost all my money at the racetrack."
Sapphire (grabbing a rolling pin): "I'm gonna beat you to oblivion!"

by IGKYA53 April 22, 2020