Dick to the face: Anything that impedes the goodness of life such as failing a class, getting a detention, etc.. A dick to the face can also be something lame that catches you off gaurd, such as a pop quiz. Dick to the face is a substitute of the word gay, meaning sucky.
If the situation calls for a more drastic description say " Thats an epic dick to the face!" or "That's God's dick to the face!"
Instead of using the word gay, meaning something that is bad or sucks (Example: You leave your homework at home you might say " oh my god. that's so freaking gay.") you can say "thats a dick to the face!"
Just imagine how awful if would be to get hit in the face with a dick and then it all makes sense.
Texting abbreviations: D2TF or DTTF
I lost my wallet! Thats a dick to the face!
Statement: My girlfriend dumped me.
Response:Dude...thats a(epic) dick to the face.