Someone who pwns so dominantly their pwn techniques are very similar to that of Conan the Barbarian or Conan the Destroyer(whatever you like best)
Holy shit, duel wield something bitches! Here comes Pwnan!
when you haven't had any kind of sexual anything with a woman for a very long time and you try to make it better by massive masterbation you develop a case of the bloobies or (blue balls).
Colton has the biggest damn case of the blue balls i've ever seen. They look like giant blue berries for Christ's sake.