So you want to be a Yuppie? Here's what you have to do.
Never act masculine. Masculine is macho, you know, and all the soccer moms just HATE anything masculine.
Never learn how to drive a stick shift like a man. Drive a wussy automatic, just like an old grandma. Or a chimpanzee. Step on your brakes all the time, just like an old lady. Ride your brakes going down all hills. Never learn how to gear down your transmission or take it out of overdrive.
Cultivate arrogance. Wear it on your face as a smug expression. Always talk down to waiters and service people, to let them know you're a hot-shit Yuppie. To prove your worth, always blow a trumpet fanfare when you lock your car. Be the first Yuppie on the block to buy a set of trumpets that blow when you lock your house. Everyone wants to hear trumpets, and they will all look up to you in awe and admiration.
Always jabber and prattle on your cell phone like an old lady gossiping. Everyone who sees you will admire you.
Learn to call problems "issues," just like a soccer mom. All the soccer moms will admire you for that.
Tell everyone you're going on vacation in Cancun or St. Tropez. That will surely score you big points with the soccer moms.
Always carry a PDA. The more useless things it does, the better. Show everyone how it can dial a phone and remind you it's time to go for your manicure. For extra points, let it remind you to go for a pedicure.
When a crowd is listening, pick up your cell phone and talk LOUDLY. Say "buy 40,000 shares of IBM."
Wherever you go, assume an air of entitlement. You are entitled to take your dog inside stores, despite the NO DOGS signs. You are entitled to use your cell phone in the movies. You are entitled to two parking spaces.
Trent is an insipid, smirking Yuppie. He is entitled to park his Lexus in the handicap parking place because he'll only be in the store for 20 minutes.
by Delicious Tuna Wanda September 29, 2007
a country faker. one who acts country when they are truly cityfolk.

"a cityfolk who thinks they country just cuz they may act it or dress or listen to country, when really they are a country faker and aint gotta clue wat they talkin bout"
the girl at the country bonfire, was such a yuppie. she couldn't even handle one can of beer.
by devilslilangel August 02, 2013
someone who is two in to them selves and the nature, who drives there hybrids around every where and drink 8 dollar coffees and are to cool for non environmental people also known as a city boy. A yuppie is also afraid to get there hands dirty (have a actual job) or go to the woods and camp or hunt!!
a pussy ex. yuppie
by heartoregon503 November 16, 2011
80s term for yo-pro, contemporary term for young, urban professional created by Kat Martin.
Now that I've got that financed car, hip apartment, and 9-5 job, I'm officially a yo-pro.
by Kat Martin July 26, 2003
a yuppie is a rare crossbreed of yak and guppie
steve: "you would like turkey bacon you yuppie!"
(Y)oung (U)rban) (P)rofessional. Someone who's in their 20s or 30s and makes a good salary. Often times hated by people with nothing else better to do than to complain, yet most yuppies just do their job and mind their own business. They're usually in the larger metropolitan areas such as New York, Chicago, Philadelphia, San Francisco, etc.
by Imayuppie February 05, 2014
Made famous by yours truly, Yuppie can be used in many way. It can be used as a replacement for yup, yes or yea. Yuppie is a word you add to a sentence randomly to make people think you're happy and awesome. What's the first thing you think of when you say Yuppie... PUPPY!
I went to the park yuppie = i went to the park and it was fun
by tamps-man June 15, 2013
A young person who comes from wealth who now is trying to be a free spirit like a hippie but is too lazy to do anything with there life. Instead of working the beg for money and get mad when people don't give them money and tell them to go back home and get a life.
The young guy on bart wearing unwashed but fairly expensive clothing, putting on petula oil. Get a life you Yuppie!
by bartrider July 28, 2011

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