Scott: "Just turn your damn phone off!"
Jake: "But I can't ... I'm awaiting a text or call from Olga the Lingerie Model about our date tomorrow. Laz is such a texticle."
Scott: "No ... He just needs to get laid."
Typically found on internet forums, where the above dwell like light-hating troglodytes waiting to spring upon and shred anything regardless of its validity or reason.
D00d with texticles: lololol L2P newb! Don't make come over and fuck you in the ear!!!!11!!1
NGTG: Really? I just asked a simple question, that's not necessary.
D00D: GFYS!!1 Go DIAF nub! I'll come to your work and piss on your desk and rape your cat!11!!! LAWLZ!!!!11!
Other guy in forum: Ignore him, new guy, he found an exploit and has been griefing everyone. I think his texticles just dropped the ther day and he thinks he's hot shit.
D00D: muthafucka i am 6'10 320 pouns jujitzu and mooey tie 8 dan streetfighter i will pwn u irl an u lucky i canno leave the st8 becuz im on paroll for killing tre fools that talk shit to me.
Chris gulped. "She didn't answer, did she?"
Jason shook his head yes. "Didn't matter, bro. I took the ring back to Zales and got some mad pussy instead."
Chris grinned. "Seems to me like all texticles come in pairs. If you ain't one of them, just get the fuck out of there. That's what my mother did."