The act of attempting to instill fear into someones mind by sharply turning your head only and staring into their eyes with a sharp look, only to fail due to not being threatening or deadly in anyway. Usually attempted by fat, overweight people, or by a man by the name of Johnathan Diaz.

Reference to Steven Seagals film cover of "Today You Die"
"I bumped into someone earlier and he tried to give me the Seagal Staredown. Was I supposed to feel threatened?"
by crimsonchin27 March 30, 2011
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One of the coolest actors ever. A ninja and not afraid to show it.
Me> damn, steven seagal is the fucking man

Retard> that guy is a shitty actor and his movies su-

Steven Seagal> -appears out of nowhere and swiftfully executes a flawless move, paralyzing the un-wise one from the back down-

Me> thanks, steven

Steven Seagal> no problemo -dissapears-
by GOERNR January 17, 2006
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A lesbian that looks like the "D" list actor Steven Seagal.
X: "Holy Shit! Is that Steven Seagal?"
Y: "No dumb ass, that's a bull dyke lesbian dressed like a biker- a lesbian seagal."
by Kraut Stain April 24, 2010
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When you shit in a white tube sock and then proceed to recklessly beat people with it like Steven Seagal in his prime.
Will burst out of the water closet and proceeded to Steven Seagal Jacob, leaving a trail of feces behind him.
by Butt-Fart Jackson October 13, 2011
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An actor who is funnier to use in "Chuck Norris jokes" instead of Chuck Norris simply beacause the fact of that he is more awesome.

He is good friends with Jackie Chan.
He speaks fluent japanese
He is an Aikido master of 7th dan.
He owns a dojo in japan.
He is almost always seen in a ponytail.
He is the greatest man alive.

Besides making badass action movies, Steven Seagal also plays the guitar and sings. And of course he's in a band.
Steven Seagal doesn't care what time it is, he decides what time it is.

Everytime boogieman goes to sleep he checks under his bed for Chuck Norris, however every time Chuck Norris goes to bed he checks his under his bed, inside his closet, outside his window, in the living room, kitchen and in his garage for Steven Seagall.



Steven Seagal: The secret is not to act, but to be.
by Kniv April 15, 2009
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Fat, out of shape actor who has trouble speaking because of his fat face. Moves hands a lot when he has to fight. Fights in films don't last long because he tires very quickly
A line from any steven seagal movie

Villian: Ha Ha My plan is almost complete
Seagal: mmm mmmmm mm mm huuuh mmm huuuhhh mmm huuhhh

Seagal proceeds to beat up villian very slowly
by ric flair August 8, 2006
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When you sexually assult a woman then pay her off to keep quiet about it.
That dude is greasy, I heard he gave her a Filthy Seagal in order to keep from being arrested.
by PseudoSeagal March 3, 2023
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