A person so fat that cannonball jumping into a pool breaks and evaporates the chlorine there and a sheer amount of it gets released as a byproduct and does actual damage to the ozone layer.
...and there Bobby was, his image frozen in the peripheral vision of his fellow unsuspecting high schoolers, a boy in fetal position midair releasing so much energy that civilizations of old would've contemplated the event as the birth of a new sun. As it hit the water, that heavily incarnated pool warhead created a huge pressure of air that could be felt miles away, shaking windows and collapsing trees. First graders that were inside the pool evaporated. Lenin woke up and knew communism was needed once more.
by targium December 26, 2017