Where what some consider the happiest people in America (the Amish) almost never show it, where the "gay Dutch" hate gays, where you can't find anything to eat between Philadelphia airport and Lancaster, where it takes a year to get a farmer at a market you see two or three times a week to make conversation with you, and where you get fat, get gray, and die. I gained 30 pounds in three years. Probably the snack capital of the country, with no park districts I've seen to walk those calories off (that would require foresight, education, and civic planning). None of the middle age folk I got to know gave me any sense they liked me 'til I was moving.

Go ahead, fall in love with it in December, 'cause most of PA was made for Christmas (farmhouse kitsch, anyone?), but for culture's sake, don't move there. The reverse of Narnia, it's always Christmas in Pennsyltucky, but never charmed. Even an instutution as powerful, monied, dispursed, and excellent as Penn State can't address the ignorance of the populace. Trust me. If you don't have an AARP card, don't move there.

Better than your state. Sure, the roads suck, but not as bad as parts of Kentucky. Sure, the people can be dumb, but not as dumb as in Alabama. Sure, the weather sucks, but not as badly as it does in Alaska. Yeah, okay, it's a little rural, and you have to buy your liquor in state stores, and there's no beaches, but at least we're not West Virginia. Or Iowa.

Plus, the Amish are cool, we make ketchup and chocolate, the Steelers used to be a decent team, and hey! we've got a town called Intercourse.

The only place in the U.S. in which no matter how small a town is, there will always be at least two bars, even if there is not one other business.

like most states, pennsylvania has two large cities and the rest is dotted with small hick towns.

the four seasons in pennsylvania are:

1. almost winter
2. winter
3. still winter
4. construction

Literally meaning "Penn's Woods" but better defined by Democratic political strategist James Carville as "Philadelphia in the east, Pittsburgh in the west and Alabama in the middle!" Middle of the state jokingly referred to as "Pennsyltucky". Home of perpetual road construction and an important swing state in national politics. Powerball lottery state. Actually kinda nice.

this is all in a Facebook group...

You know you're from Pennsylvania when:
-You've never referred to Philadelphia as anything but "Philly." And New Jersey has always been "Jersey."
-You refer to Pennsylvania as "PA."
-"You guys" is a perfectly acceptable reference to a group of men & women.
-You know how to respond to the question "Djeetyet?" (Didyoueatyet?)
-You learned to pronounce Bryn Mawr, Wilkes-Barre, Schuylkill, Bala Cynwyd, Duquesne, New Tripoli, Tunkhannock, Punxsutawney, Tamaqua, Susquehanna, Allegheny, and Monongahela.
-The first day of buck and the first day of doe season are school holidays.
-You can use the phrase "fire hall wedding reception" and not even bat an eye.
-You can't go to a wedding without hearing the "Chicken Dance," at least one Polka and either an Italian song (sung in Italian,) or "Hava Nagila."
-At least 5 people on your block have electric "candles" in all or most of their windows all year long.
-You know what a "Hex sign" is.
-You know what a "State Store" is, and your out of state friends find it incredulous that you can't purchase liquor at the mini-mart.
-You own only three condiments "A-1, Heinz 57 and Heinz ketchup".
-Words like "hoagie", "crick", "chipped ham", "sticky buns", "shoo-fly pie", "pierogies" and "pocketbook" actually mean something to you.
-You can eat cold pizza (even for breakfast) and know others who do the same.
-You know several places to purchase or that serve Scrapple, Summer Sausag...

A powerful state in the Eastern portion of the country. The Keystone State is made up of Pennsylvania proper and its external territories of Delaware and Southern New Jersey (hey, it has a friggin' sinister looking Keystone as its logo). The state is divided into three regions: 1.Philadelphia/East, 2. Pittsburgh/West, and the T- a solid GOP controlled, rural territory that is reminiscent of everywhere in Ohio outside of Cleveland. This state has the dubious distinction of having possibly the shittiest roads in the nation. From farting around outside Uniontown to the '40's era PA turnpike, you will never find shittier roads anywhere else. Also famous for being the home of the Delcaration of Independence, the Constitution, Heinz Ketchup, and freaky place names like Eighty-Four, Conshoshcockton, and King of Prussia (named for a bar).

A state in the northeastern United States. One of the first states. Its major cities are Philadelphia in the east and Pittsburgh in the west. Central PA is filled with beautiful countryside and the capital, Harrisburg, also to several Amish farms (go to Lancaster if you want to see a good example). Although PA doesn't have the best roads in the country, it is full of beautiful scenery and friendly people. It is also where our nation began. The Declaration of Independence was signed in Philadelphia, the nation's first capital, on July 4th, 1776. Other significant states to see if you like American history would be Massachusetts and Virginia, correct me if I missed one. I don't know much about Pittsburgh, I apologize, so could someone from Pittsburgh back me up?