Masterbathon 

a masterbathon is a day that you stay home from school "sick" so you can beat off so many times that you are dry and chaffed and can't walk so the next day you have to stay home and do it all over again

Mike: "Damn jimmy has been out of school all week"
Steve: "I konw he must be having a masterbathon"

Masterbathon by LifeguardSteve April 27, 2004

Management Masterbation 

When Management does something purely for their gratification that will produce nothing.

Team building exersizes, employee surveys are just a few examples of management masterbation.

Management Masterbation by jayray59 May 6, 2010

maskerbater 

A mask wearer who derives pleasure from...
1. Wearing masks in stupid places (ie: their car, shower, or bed.
2. "Enforcing" mask wearing by yelling at others to put their masks on.

Karen is such a maskerbater. She just peered over and yelled, "Hey! Stop being a murderer. Put your mask on!" - I was pooping in a stall.

maskerbater by MBWDT July 25, 2020

macturbate 

v. to pleasure oneself through use of an Apple product

Once Mike gets the new iPhone he's going to macturbate for a week straight.

macturbate by eponymousrhinocerous September 11, 2012

masterbate 

To masturbate like a master

I masterbated really well yesterday.

masterbate by ‮ekil skool ti tahw t'nsi sihT January 12, 2022

violent masterbation 

Masterbating in an extreme manner; associated with shaking, yelling, high speed, and possibly pain.

Josh had the greatest money-shots ever, but he died from too much violent masterbation.

violent masterbation by Bigg N October 27, 2006

mapturbate 

To browse maps by yourself, usually aimlessly.

He mapturbated on Google Earth for an hour before going to bed.

mapturbate by jestmenh October 23, 2005