Joel Osteen 

A inspirational speaker who is over paid and takes money from anyone and everyone. Someone who had to endure public lashouts against him to motivate him to do the right thing. An actual piece of human shit.

I just took the biggest joel osteen.

Joel Osteen by thatjedikid_ August 30, 2017

Joel Osteen 

A born again Christian who runs the largest Christian church in the United States. He and his father founded "Prosperity Gospel Christianity". His primary message is that if you are a "good Christian", you will make money, and that the bible says you should make money and be rich. When, in fact, the bible says exactly the opposite, and it is something that Jesus explicitly warned against.

He recieved some heavy criticism for refusing to open up his 16,800-seat Lakewood Church to victims of Hurricane Harvey in 2017.

"Did you make it to church today? Joel Osteen sure had a wild service."
"Joel Osteen only cares about money."

Joel Osteen by Roudydogg1 March 23, 2019

Joel osteen 

Evil preacher who preaches for millions of dollars but wont lift a finger until guilt tripped to help hurricane victims hes litterly leading over 7 million people straight to hell in a handbasket . A true pawn of the antichrist.

Joel osteen is a pawn of satan.

Joel osteen by frien June 14, 2019

Haley Joel Osment 

One of the most amazing people on the planet earth. Not only did he star in The Sixth Sense at the young age of 11, he was nominated for an Academy award and won a Saturn award. He is a straight A student, talented in many sports, and plays piano and guitar. The best and most talented performer ever. Also called HJO. One of the only child stars to not become a druggie or something equally bad. He grew up to be very healthy and attractive. (although he did flip his car over from drunk driving and got arrested once for possession of drugs =(. BUT he immiditley fixed this up and continued acting =)

Haley Joel Osment: *huge, terrified eyes full of emotion, talent, and tears* "they don't see each other. They only see what they want to see..."
M. Night Shamayalan: ohmygod
Bruce Willis: lucky...
Jealous prick: stupid nerd
Me: *SLAP*
HJO is awesome

Haley Joel Osment by kitikat88 January 8, 2009

Joel Osteen 

A famous and powerful preacher in Houston Texas. He is also known as the smiling preacher. He has received some criticism from other preachers that only want to tell you that you're going to hell and from people that get mad that a preacher is making money. He has also been accussed of not preaching from the Bible however, there hasn't been a single cermon he has done that he has not used or changed any scriptures. He has been respondsible for attracting millions of people to the Christian faith. In addition, at of 2009 he has the largest church in the United States. He has been noted on teaching people not only prosperity through God but also how to help people, tolerate people, stay faithful, and stride for your goals through God. He has also stated that prosperity is not always money but health, or just having a good job. He continues to touch millions of hearts and lives.

God Jesus Christian Love Christianity Jesus Christ Joel Osteen

Joel Osteen by mc of prayer July 20, 2009

Joel Osteen 

The happiest man alive in Texas. He is a Christian pastor that often says "You are a child of the most-high God". Has a creepy smile.

Joel Osteen: "-and this child had severe autism, just like me!"
*Creepy smile intensifies*

Joel Osteen by Weaponized Dank Ootism September 23, 2019

Joel Thomas Osteen Jr 

Is the most amazing guy on this earth. He is an excellent boy friend to his girl friend, Rowena 'Roey' Kay Woolard. He is sweet, kind, lovable, smart, funny, romantic, brave, strong, and so much more. From what I can tell he is also an amazing son, brother, uncle, nephew, grandson, and cousin. He makes the world look dull because his light shines so brightly. All in all, Joel Thomas Osteen Jr, is by far the most incredible person on this planet.

WARNING: CAN BE A HAZARD TO ALL FEMALES OUTSIDE HIS FAMILY AND IS NOT HIS GIRL FRIEND, ROWENA 'ROEY' KAY WOOLARD. WHY IS HE A HAZARD? WELL, HIS IS GIRL FRIEND, ROWENA 'ROEY' KAY WOOLARD, HAS SWORN TO DESTROY ANY FEMALE WHO TRIES ANYTHING FUNNY.

Rowena : Joel Thomas Osteen Jr is so amazing! I love him to death! <3

Alex : Awww,you two are such a cute couple! :)

Joel Thomas Osteen Jr by Roeyzilla July 11, 2011