jizzus

Jizzus is when a man is performing intercourse with a woman who often exclaims "oh my God" during moments of pleasure, and the gentleman therefore climaxes to the mental image of Jesus Christ, and since the man is not properly hydrated, he dry-fires inside the woman but she still becomes impregnated, mirroring the emaculate conception of Jesus Christ

George Stephanopoulos: " Hey I heard you nailed Mrs. Huck last night, how did that go?".

Alexander Dumas:"yeah, she kept on screaming 'oh my god!', so when I finally nutted I had a jizzus."

jizzus by Søren Kierkegaard October 6, 2017

Jizzus Crust 

The divine scabs that develop in and around most sinners souls.

That goddamned Jizzus Crust is tarnishing my reputation.

Jizzus Crust by Ranchgirls December 11, 2020

Jezus 

Either the lord and savior or the guy mowing your lawn

Person A: Do you know Jezus is watching you.
Person B: Yes he is mowing my lawn.

Jezus by Your friendly rebbel October 14, 2016

Jazzus 

Used as a proper noun for a jazz artist who achieves god-like prominence or ability.

Ringo: Did you hear that guitarist at the 55?

Paul: Yeah. They call him "Jazzus."

Ringo: Why?

Paul: Because he's bigger than Jesus!

Jazzus by Off The Handle December 9, 2008

JeZeus 

The Ultimate Fusion between Jesus and Zeus,
Together they are unstoppable

guy1: hey do you like Jesus?
guy2: Yeah
guy1: well jesus sucks its all about jezeus now
guy2: idk man i think thats too much power

JeZeus by The Golden Flare February 5, 2021

Jeezus

The worshiped deity who is the antithesis of the historical figure Jesus. He hates gays, does not allow women to end pregnancies from rapists, believes in Ayn Rand style individualism, guns, hatred of others who do not worship Jeezus, public prayer in schools and political events, and Social Darwinism. When compared to the historical Jesus who told his followers to sell all and give to the poor, render unto Cesar that which is Cesars (pay your taxes), judge not lest ye be judged, pray in your closet unlike the hypocrites who pray on the corner, and the kingdom of god is within you; we can see the direct contrast of the deity worshiped and propped up by some sects of Christianity.

Jesus was a nice guy, he wanted to help the sick, poor, and outcasts of society.

Jeezus carries assault rifles and thinks killing abortion doctors is justifiable.

Jesus said to turn the other cheek.

Jeezus says "Annihilate all those who do not believe in me as you do."

Jeezus by The Divine Is Within Us All January 3, 2011

Jeezus

A corrupted spelling of Jesus, especially when used as a swear word.

Aw Jeezus, I pissed my shorts again.

Jeezus by LudwigVan December 6, 2003