jelly sword

The really poor excuse for an erection that all men will almost invariably try to put into effect after an overly beery night out (or in if you're a loser).

Usually ends up exposed and marker penned by so-called mates when you finally pass out and lack the capacity or care to put it away.

Tom had throughly shit sex as he had a drunken jelly sword and could not achieve decent penetration.

"I couldn't have a wank as I had a jelly sword"

Sally laughed at Gareth's tiny jelly sword.