A prisoner who has not practice law or had any legal training, but is disposed to a lengthy discussion of his legal rights and those of other inmates
by The Return of Light Joker June 23, 2009
Posing for a picture as if one were locked behind bars in a jail. This could include squatting down low to the ground and throwing up gang signs, or standing up with arms crossed, head to the sky, acting real confident,
by Molly Mollzzzz August 29, 2008
A sudden shift in belief systems (usually finding Jesus, but also Allah and probably every other Deity) after a period of incarceration. Usually a ploy for leniency with the legal system. Oddly, given the separation of church and state that we're supposed to have in this country, it does sometimes seem to have a positive effect when going to talk to the judge/parole board. Everyone from your local meth dealer to Manuel Noriega, Dictator of Panama have tried this one, making it one of the truly "oldest ones in the book".
typical jailhouse conversion:
Crack Dealer: Your Honor, I found Jesus in the Dade County Jail.
Judge: Big deal, this is Florida, every third guy in there is named Jesus....
Crack Dealer: Your Honor, I found Jesus in the Dade County Jail.
Judge: Big deal, this is Florida, every third guy in there is named Jesus....
by Madmann October 11, 2005
by Bulldog March 8, 2007
You can't blame Frank for being testy now that he's out of prison, that's four years of getting the jailhouse special...
by Hugh Lloyd September 24, 2006
by jimmycrackcornnnnn May 15, 2010
a disgusting concoction mistaken for food in the prison system.
the jailhouse burrito is completely unrelated to an actual burrito, and contains none of the same ingredients; one is to assume it is named for appearance.
to make a jailhouse burrito, 2 - 3 bags of doritos are crushed and mixed together in one bag with a chopped up slim jim and a sauce to alter flavour (ketchup, mustard, hot sauce, soap, potato vodka, etc.). a small ammount of water is added (about 1/4 the bag), and it is sealed up and allowed to sit.
after a while, the water causes the crushed-up doritos to expand, encompassing the other ingredients and holding them static in the loaf (burrito).
the bag is cut away with a shiv, revealing a dorito-bag-shaped, salty dorito-based loaf with a similar appearance to a large wet burrito.
it is truly sickening, and can cause diarrhoea in a stomach that is not accustomed to the atrocious food eaten by prisoners.
not recommended to be tried by free humans.
or animals.
(this is a real recipe)
the jailhouse burrito is completely unrelated to an actual burrito, and contains none of the same ingredients; one is to assume it is named for appearance.
to make a jailhouse burrito, 2 - 3 bags of doritos are crushed and mixed together in one bag with a chopped up slim jim and a sauce to alter flavour (ketchup, mustard, hot sauce, soap, potato vodka, etc.). a small ammount of water is added (about 1/4 the bag), and it is sealed up and allowed to sit.
after a while, the water causes the crushed-up doritos to expand, encompassing the other ingredients and holding them static in the loaf (burrito).
the bag is cut away with a shiv, revealing a dorito-bag-shaped, salty dorito-based loaf with a similar appearance to a large wet burrito.
it is truly sickening, and can cause diarrhoea in a stomach that is not accustomed to the atrocious food eaten by prisoners.
not recommended to be tried by free humans.
or animals.
(this is a real recipe)
by Wild Drunken Bill July 18, 2008