illegitimate father 

1. A father who does not acknowledge his children.

2. A father who acknowledges a child or children privately and not publicly.

3. A father who acknowledges paternity but does not take responsibility equal to the mother for meeting the child's needs.

Thomas Jefferson was an illegitimate father of a number of children.

illegitimate father by Denverite3 December 12, 2014

illegitimate masturbating 

1. what jesus is said to have condemned as the greatest sin to be commited as "it is wasting thy knuckle children into a sock only to be put into the bottom ov a hamper."

2. what is done on a daily basis in the white house

3. learning algebra

4. sharing files on frostwire

i gotta go do some illegitimate masturbating

illegitimate masturbating by incipitsathanas October 19, 2009

illegitimate child 

A child whose parents were not married to each other at the time of his or her birth.

You're an illegitimate child! At least my parents were married!

illegitimate child by CallMeDanni_xx July 31, 2016

illegitimate 

Used to describe that a child is not yours. Thus, making you immune to child support.

Can be traced back to as early as greek mythology.

Zeus or Posiden had a baby with Hoecles who had a son named Illegitimacus

Since Hoecles cannot prove that Zeus or Posiden are the father, Illegitimacus is therefore Illegitimate, meaning none of them have to pay child support

illegitimate by italian-props to wops- September 18, 2006

illegitimate invitation 

Issuing an invitation which the other person can't accept, in the hope that you get credit for asking but don't have to follow through.

J. "Wanna go to dinner?"
N. "You know I gotta babysit my sister's 4 kids! That's an illegitimate invitation!"

illegitimate invitation by wordgrl August 5, 2008

illegitimate weiner cousin 

gaining a weiner cousin through your wife while married

My wife cheated on me so many times that I have no idea how many illegitimate weiner cousins I have.

illegitimate weiner cousin by timmy10 October 15, 2019

illegitamate fold 

(n) A universal word, can be but is not limited to the following:

Moronic highschool boys, European chestnuts, chicken patties, duct tape bags, gorrilas named philis in Stockholm, Stockholm, water bottles, the ringing of a telephone, HGTV, runners, pure bred dogs, cards received on Valentine's day, the end of World War II, N*SYNC songs, Jessica Simpson's music videos (recent)*, school lunch, chicken stew, Aladin, parentheses, asshats, seniors, male genitalia, gonads and strife, Hugh Grant's prostitute, babies born in February, tropical plant life, librarians, Sweet Caroline, The Yankees, the Pacific Ocean, Dell Computers, Girlscout Cookies, bio homework, Mary Kate and Ashley movies made after their seventh-and-a-half year, games with age limits, no soap in highschool bathrooms, ringtones, Chuck Berry, Chuck Norris, numchucks, knickerbockers, unsanitary workout equiptment, prehistoric cell phones; anything prehistoric, cat toys, cat nip, Santa Claus, Latin, Chevy, getting hit by a bus, orange fruit, seashells, starfish in the desert, and buttwater.

*To satisfy our readers

"I just consumed an illegitamate fold."
"The optomologist removed an illegitamate fold from my left testicle."
"The Red Sox PWNED the illegitamate fold."

illegitamate fold by Philis and Earl Jr. Czachistan December 17, 2007