hatemeal

When your meal doesn’t go as planned, for one reason or another, so you angrily plow your way through the food for the shear nourishment. Hatemeal is often the result of a failed recipe, poor cooking technique, or even poor dinner company.

Cody: I just watched a guy storm around the corner and throw a frozen dinner in the microwave. He slammed the Cook button, then the 6, then Start button and then stormed off. The microwave ran for 6 seconds...

Chris: That's too good. His anger should be able to heat the dish thoroughly when he returns in 5 minutes 54 seconds and realizes what he had done (or doesn't realize and blames it on the microwave).
I'm jealous I didn't get to witness that. Video?

Cody: It all happened so fast. He was like the Flash. What makes it funnier is that I watched the keystrokes and I still couldn't stop him before he had blazed off. What make him think that he's gonna have time to eat if he can’t even take the time to cook the food properly?

Chris: Ha. No kidding.

Cody: He seems stressed and this failure surely didn't help, but this will be a good lesson for him. It’s totally within the realm of possibility that he just ate it "as is". Just angrily crunched his way through his icey lunch. That'll teach em.

Chris: Hatemeal. Could be an Urban Dictionary entry.

Cody: Ah! good idea. My creative juices are not flowing in this vanilla environment though. I may have Darren get on that one.

Darren: Done.

hatemeal by Darren Besert February 1, 2017

Tomato Haste

The annual act of prematurely harvesting the first crop of homegrown tomatoes, on account of impatience with the long summer growing season.

Once again, Cookie's tomato haste resulted in an unsatisfying Caprese salad.

Tomato Haste by triggerboston August 3, 2012

Hateman 

Frequent voice mail caller on The Howard Stern Show mostly between 2003 and 2005. He was nicknamed Hateman after repeated angry and racist voice mails against blacks, hispanics, asians, west indians, the catholic church and some celebrities.

Hateman is also extrememly sexually attracted to Robin Quivers and will usually leave a sexual message directed at her towards the end of his rants.

He has recently began calling into the show again on Sirius after a long hiatus with his first message left on June 6th, 2006.

To this day no one on the show knows who he really is although Artie Lange has speculated that his accent is either from Staten Island or Brooklyn.

Howard Stern: "Hateman went to town on you again Robin because you lost weight and he's all worked up"

Hateman (via Voice mail 09-06-2007): "Hey Robin my fine little monkey bitch, how you doin' baby? You slimming down huh? Dr. Ronnie's got you in fighting shape. Well I'll tell you what, I wanna pound that pussy and have Dr Ronnie give me a high colonic while I'm in you. But she's got to give me the high colonic with her fucking toungue that rich doctor bitch. This better not be another one of your fucking fads like your magic elixer last time. I don't know you go on these unrealistic diets, and then like you balloon back up. You can't keep doing that to your system bitch, know what I mean? ALL I KNOW IS THAT I WANNA TAKE OUT THIS GODDAMN TROSWER TROUT FUCKING SNAKE THROUGH MY PANTS AND STICK IT RIGHT IN YOUR YAP YOU NIGGER BASTARD. YOU'RE GOING LICK ME YOU FUCKING COON. YOU KNOW THAT I WANT IT YOU BLOWHEAD FUCK. I WANNA TUG ON THOSE DREADS AND HAVE YOU LICK MY ASSHOLE. THAT'S RIGHT, AND THEN I'LL LICK YOUR FUCKING CUNT. AHHHHH, YOU FINE LITTLE MOCHA SKIN BITCH. YOU KNOW THAT I WANT IT BAD. YOU KNOW YOU WANT THIS WHITE FUCKING COCK, I WANNA GIVE YOU MY WHITE HOT STICKY LOAD I'LL MAKE YOU LOOK LIKE-"

<Cut off by voice mail system>

Howard Stern: "Oh my god, he's so obsessed with you"

Robin Quivers: "Yeah, but where is he...?"

Howard Stern: "I want Dr Ronnie to give him that high colonic"

Artie Lange: "I'm impressed that Hateman clearly managed to come up with the 13 bucks a month for Satellite"

Hateman by Zorba The Swamp Monster January 4, 2008

Post-Haste Post 

The act of posting an image or text too quickly onto social media before it has been properly edited, resulting in errors such as misspellings, poor grammar, or improper abbreviations which can lead to feelings of remorse or regret in the person making the post.

Mary regretted her Post-Haste Post to Facebook of her husband Morty pictured at their 20th anniversary party with him holding a can of Coke in one hand and a piece of cake in the other which she inadvertently captioned, "Everything goes better with Cock"!

Post-Haste Post by Jetta101 February 28, 2014

Make haste 

A phrase you use to tell someone to hurry up.

Person A: "Oh no, they're gaining on us!"
Person B: "Well, don't just stand there! Make haste!"

Make haste by Make Haste December 9, 2008

Hasteens 

a word used to describe anything. In effect, it provides a smooth (and often comical) transition when one doesn't quite have the word to describe the "thing".

Originated: Steve B, Camp Taconic, Hinsdale, MA

What's on the hasteens for lunch today? Chunky hasteens?

Hasteens by JFritz January 3, 2008

Hasten 

1. To do or say something without delay, often in order to correct what might otherwise be a misleading impression.

2. To speed something up.

3. To go somewhere quickly or without delay.

1. "But she's perfectly right," he hastened to add.
2. A vacation would hasten his recovery.
3. He hastened to her side.

Hasten by Jafje April 15, 2007