**WARNINGS**
-ASS WILL BE SLAPPED, GRABBED, OR OTHERWISE GROPED
-7TH GRADE MATH TEACHERS WILL LOOK DOWN YOUR SHIRT
-YOU WILL GET HIGH OFF THE MENTHOL COUGH DROPS...if u try hard enough...
-stay clear of staircases... 10 foot high linoleum splat death... tie shoes
*reminder: you CAN walk over the people on the ground mid-fight...probably got one swing and pussied out anyway..*
welcome to the home of the patriots!
derived from a name that refers those in the 17th century who rejected loyalist agenda and rebelled against British control, there is no fucking way you would've learned and retained that information with Great Valley's curriculum.. you'll learn more meeting GOD off of the drugs provided in any big stall constructed for the sole purpose of passing penjamins and trapping elf bars. but before you're corrupted by hand-me-down fentanyl laced adderall, you move up the ranks of GV, where each year your innocence is slowly stolen and your intelligence is blatantly exploited by administrative trash... if you think that's harsh just wait til you hear about the way the people up top handle things.. little issues, you know, like racism or assault... you'd think a blue ribbon school, voted one of the top 5 in chester county, would take those matters more seriously...but.. BLUE WHITE AND PRIVILEGE THESE COLORS DON'T RUN BABYYY. AND "my kid is an honor student at great valley high school" has such a nice ring to it.
-ASS WILL BE SLAPPED, GRABBED, OR OTHERWISE GROPED
-7TH GRADE MATH TEACHERS WILL LOOK DOWN YOUR SHIRT
-YOU WILL GET HIGH OFF THE MENTHOL COUGH DROPS...if u try hard enough...
-stay clear of staircases... 10 foot high linoleum splat death... tie shoes
*reminder: you CAN walk over the people on the ground mid-fight...probably got one swing and pussied out anyway..*
welcome to the home of the patriots!
derived from a name that refers those in the 17th century who rejected loyalist agenda and rebelled against British control, there is no fucking way you would've learned and retained that information with Great Valley's curriculum.. you'll learn more meeting GOD off of the drugs provided in any big stall constructed for the sole purpose of passing penjamins and trapping elf bars. but before you're corrupted by hand-me-down fentanyl laced adderall, you move up the ranks of GV, where each year your innocence is slowly stolen and your intelligence is blatantly exploited by administrative trash... if you think that's harsh just wait til you hear about the way the people up top handle things.. little issues, you know, like racism or assault... you'd think a blue ribbon school, voted one of the top 5 in chester county, would take those matters more seriously...but.. BLUE WHITE AND PRIVILEGE THESE COLORS DON'T RUN BABYYY. AND "my kid is an honor student at great valley high school" has such a nice ring to it.
"i was apart of Great Valley School District and now I'm a teenage mother with aspirations of being the Top Female Trap Queen on the Main Line"
"Great Valley School District robbed me of my childhood and literally lit my house on fire..?!"
"i loved being apart of Great Valley School District! (**i peaked in high-school**)."
"i was apart of Great Valley School District for only 3 years and all i have to show for it is chlamydia and this dumb t-shirt."
"Great Valley School District robbed me of my childhood and literally lit my house on fire..?!"
"i loved being apart of Great Valley School District! (**i peaked in high-school**)."
"i was apart of Great Valley School District for only 3 years and all i have to show for it is chlamydia and this dumb t-shirt."
by boombastia September 7, 2023
in your high school years of this esteemed organization, funded by PTO freaks and lowkey wino soccer moms, you'll embark on a wonderful journey of hallway hookups, big stall seshes, the crushing reality of your personal mortality, and self discovery. widely known as "THE PHARMACY", someone you know will OD within the first week of school and post about it afterward with the jarring caption of "just another silly day"... you'll likely develop an eating disorder as if you weren't already barely choking down your shitty cafeteria lunch after looking at that hollow red arrow next to your crush's name after he begged you to "make his night ;)". you'll be balls deep in assignments WHILE being reminded to "get outside and enjoy that weather!".. they're so sweet to think of you <3 now the genre of teachers that inhabit this prison range from 'Super Sick Nasty Chill Dad/Mom Would Name Ur Kid After' to 'WILL Rip Up, Eat, and Shit Out Your Dumb Fragile Teenage Emotions"... there is no in between... tread lightly. **WARNING** the current principle of this school has the eyes of a cold dead fish and will 100% stop u in the middle of a busy hallway to make u cover ur shoulders.** it'll be a dream!...as long as you disassociate the entire time :)
anyway don't go here... stay safe... homeschool or go off the grid instead <3
anyway don't go here... stay safe... homeschool or go off the grid instead <3
"great valley school district (3) is the root of irreversible trauma...but that one social studies teacher was so fine." (@ great valley middle school <3)
by boombastia September 7, 2023
elementary school years: hotdogs blue and bouncy... do with that what u will.
4 elementary schools and 3 years of fresh middle school hell all preparing you for the 2 years of high school you're gonna complete before almost surely dropping out.. killing yourself... or getting pregnant during. but before an inevitable alcoholic era caused by the crushing weight of junior year, teachers gaslighting you into believing you didn't turn in that essay you pulled all nighters for, and upper class-men manipulating you into hitting a mango juul sums up your middle school experience... not to mention rumors of teacher affairs amongst other scandals... you'll be bullied, exhausted, and pressured into changing ever single thing about yourself...you'll make and lose more friends than you'll have in your entire life and join clubs and extra curriculars in hopes of social interaction, only to be met with social anxiety and an energy that reeksss of axe body spray, B.O, and desperation... the crushes you have on your 40 year old male teachers will stick with you forever... you'll never be able to get that image of yourself accidentally flashing the gymnasium out of your mind... your first kiss will be fucking atrocious...and you WILL want to die... but if i had to do it, you fucking do too.
4 elementary schools and 3 years of fresh middle school hell all preparing you for the 2 years of high school you're gonna complete before almost surely dropping out.. killing yourself... or getting pregnant during. but before an inevitable alcoholic era caused by the crushing weight of junior year, teachers gaslighting you into believing you didn't turn in that essay you pulled all nighters for, and upper class-men manipulating you into hitting a mango juul sums up your middle school experience... not to mention rumors of teacher affairs amongst other scandals... you'll be bullied, exhausted, and pressured into changing ever single thing about yourself...you'll make and lose more friends than you'll have in your entire life and join clubs and extra curriculars in hopes of social interaction, only to be met with social anxiety and an energy that reeksss of axe body spray, B.O, and desperation... the crushes you have on your 40 year old male teachers will stick with you forever... you'll never be able to get that image of yourself accidentally flashing the gymnasium out of your mind... your first kiss will be fucking atrocious...and you WILL want to die... but if i had to do it, you fucking do too.
"i went to great valley school district (2) and had to sell my entire large intestine to the mafia after i graduated.a'
by boombastia September 7, 2023
A place in a malvern where about 0.1% of the teacher are actually tolerable. At this school, you'll find childish sixth graders, horny seventh graders and asshole eighth graders. As you move up the ranks at this public school, you'll want to kill your self more and more. You're either popular and an asshole, middle class and normal, or in the nerd herd where they're all fucking weirdos. But damn Mr. Wise is fine.
I went to Great Valley Middle School and in sixth grade someone stole my lollipop, in seventh grade I got my ass slapped and in eighth grade I got beat up in the bathroom.
by Minith4life123 February 18, 2017
Home of the pharmacy, where you can buy shit weed in the bathroom and get beat up by the stoners that deal it. And plenty of people go to rehab because apparently peer pressure is real. Where you can spot hoes every two feet along the hallway. Where the only people who get beat up are the dudes who everyone mentally punches because of their douchey self-righteousness, and we laugh about it because we can. A place where you can't bend over without someone making an ass joke, and without people making trips to five below to get padded underwear for these jokes to be made on their behalf. For tons of stupid ass valley kids getting slutty and going down on the guys who want a blowjob, and uncomfortable grinds and a rough handjobs are just around the corner. And if the guys weren't horny enough, the girls who lack self confidence will choke and throw up on their dick for a compliment. The bathrooms, where the ground is always wet and messy, and people leave their throw up in the toilet. And last but certainly not least, one of the best high schools in Pennsylvania.
I went to great valley high school and now I'm fucked up for life. And the people who I went with pretend to be ghetto even though they're from Malvern.
by That hilarious mofo January 1, 2016
Welcome to Great Valley, considered one of the best high schools in the state. But, do not be fooled by its good ratings and college acceptance rates. This school really is a hit or miss place if you go. If you can find a good friend group and not piss off the administration, you will be fine. If you are socially awkward or belong to a low income family, run... just fucking run... The students who consider themselves "popular" consist of girls with daddy issues and lacrosse and football players who think that 5 inches is considered big. Everyone Juuls or smokes weed in the wet, dirty, and, moist bathrooms and end up getting a 1 day ISS then get pissed because "they didn do nothing wrong". Most of the students are pretty normal people, but, it's the small group of students that will ruin your experience at the school. You have your typical 80's movie high school groups - The nerds, The jocks, The trailer park kids, The hicks, The hoes, and last but not motherfucking least, the worst group of them all which consists of only a few Great Valley students. The rich ones. Vineyard Vines and $400 pens are the regular for this small group of lousy human beings. From daddies money to the stock trader who thinks he's hot shit just because he has more... Yes, this is what in the end makes this school a horrible place. But hey, it's still #2 in the state!
by GVHS '19 September 21, 2018
Oh boy! Another person complaining about how shitty their middle school is. For starters, this school takes great pride in how many awards they have earned in years past, but those days are long gone. Right now, there’s a major juul and bullying issue that nobody seems to be addressing. Inside of this school, you’re either the kid with anger issues who hops on every bandwagon, dates Snapchat thots, and calls people the n-word despite being 99.9% white. If you’re not that, you’re the antisocial prick who whenever somebody tries to actually have a conversation with you while doing a group project, shrivel up into you’re fucking hole and make your partner do all the work. Or maybe you’re completely normal, get honor roll near every marking period, and treat you’re classmates with respect (about 10-15% of the school). As for each grade, the 6th graders are privileged as hell, with their retarded behavior being excused as: “they’re just adapting to middle school”. 7th graders think they know everything about the school, despite only being there for a year. 8th graders have mass anxiety and unfairly taking it out on others (most of the time 7th or 6th graders). Moving on to the teachers, they’re mediocre at best. The 6th grade teachers were by far the greatest, you could actually connect with them and have a conversation with them. And with the exception of a couple teachers, pretty much any other teacher is doing their work for the paycheck. Dear god, just fix this school.
Had an actual fucking thermos yeet’d across the “Dining Hall” and hit me square in the back of the head. Had to get surgery so I wouldn't be a vegetable for the rest of my life. Fuck Great Valley Middle School.
by The house’s med cabinet April 25, 2019