She told me she was a vegetarian, but I saw her eating a whole steak yesterday. Now I know she's just a fauxgetarian.
Hotimpressionablegirl: Salad!? thats soooo noble and hott! Most guys are so diluted and human and normal and eat meat. lets go to dinner!
Fauxgetarian: *in his mind* hell yeah, and after you leave my house I'll eat my Jello and jerkey.