The supreme icon of male obsolescence in today's society. Once a woman gets a taste of the right one, she never puts up with male bullshit again. Hard when we want it, long as we like it, goes as long as we do, provides instant fantasy support so we can imagine ourselves being fucked HARD AND LONG by hot-and-sexy anybody we want to be by instead of that dumb twat swaggering around thinking he's the center of our life and about to get dumped, no wet spot, no HIV, no other woman, no other man, no backtalk, no bullshit, and when you're done with it you can dump it in a drawer and it's out of your face - no fucking phone calls, last minute date requests or sassing. To be gotten at the sex toy shop near you, and the good ones are about $100-150. Small price to pay for peace of mind, yo. GIRL, GET THAT DILDO TODAY AND WATCH YOUR SON OF A BITCH SOON TO BE EX BOYFRIEND START TO SWEAT WITH REAL FEAR.

They pretend to like it, but they don't really. Just think, a thick slab of latex gets your pussy more than they ever will. I bought mine and am NEVER looking back. And right here let's kill the myth we ladies choose dildos because "no one else would fuck us". WTF? You're on crack, you male bitches. I turn you down all the time. WE USE DILDOS BECAUSE THEY'RE BETTER THAN YOU AND BRING LESS BULLSHIT. GOSPEL TRUTH. GET SCHOOLED.
"What the fuck do I need YOU for? I've got A DILDO that makes you look like the soft bitch you are. Get the fuck out of my house, you saggy balled twat. Technology has made your ass REDUNDANT."
by HSFATTACK September 18, 2006

The Urban Dictionary Mug

Lotsa space for your liquids.

Buy the mug

The Urban Dictionary Mug

Lotsa space for your liquids.

Buy the mug

The Urban Dictionary Mug

Your favorite word on a white mug.

Create a mug

The Urban Dictionary Mug

One side has the word, one side has the definition. Microwave and dishwasher safe. Lotsa space for your liquids.

Buy the mug

The Urban Dictionary T-Shirt

Soft and offensive. Just like you.

Buy the t-shirt

The Urban Dictionary T-Shirt

Smooth, soft, slim fit American Apparel shirt. Custom printed. 100% fine jersey cotton, except for heather grey (90% cotton).

Buy the t-shirt
A fake penis that you stick up your ass/vagina.
"I can fit five dildos in my ass at one time!", explained Chris with utter joy.
by Chris Farina August 18, 2003

The Urban Dictionary Mug

Lotsa space for your liquids.

Buy the mug

The Urban Dictionary Mug

Lotsa space for your liquids.

Buy the mug

The Urban Dictionary Mug

Your favorite word on a white mug.

Create a mug

The Urban Dictionary Mug

One side has the word, one side has the definition. Microwave and dishwasher safe. Lotsa space for your liquids.

Buy the mug

The Urban Dictionary T-Shirt

Soft and offensive. Just like you.

Buy the t-shirt

The Urban Dictionary T-Shirt

Smooth, soft, slim fit American Apparel shirt. Custom printed. 100% fine jersey cotton, except for heather grey (90% cotton).

Buy the t-shirt
fake penis, a sex toy
She didn't have a boyfriend so she just pleasured herself with her dildo
by Anonymous June 16, 2002

The Urban Dictionary Mug

Lotsa space for your liquids.

Buy the mug

The Urban Dictionary Mug

Lotsa space for your liquids.

Buy the mug

The Urban Dictionary Mug

Your favorite word on a white mug.

Create a mug

The Urban Dictionary Mug

One side has the word, one side has the definition. Microwave and dishwasher safe. Lotsa space for your liquids.

Buy the mug

The Urban Dictionary T-Shirt

Soft and offensive. Just like you.

Buy the t-shirt

The Urban Dictionary T-Shirt

Smooth, soft, slim fit American Apparel shirt. Custom printed. 100% fine jersey cotton, except for heather grey (90% cotton).

Buy the t-shirt
Any rod thingy that simulates a cock that a woman or man can stick in her or his mouth, pussy, or anus. Some vibrate, while others don't. Dildos are made of different materials.
Women and men, listen.

After you stick your dildo in your ass, do not suck on it or put it in your pussy. There is shit or at least fecal residue in your ass (remember, shit comes out of your asshole), and you don't want to eat shit. Otherwise, you might as well pick up your poop from the toilet bowl and take a bite. And forget about wiping your ass because that's basically what you are doing when you rub that ass-plugged dildo all over your pussy, your mouth, and, god forbid, my mouth and ass.

Separate dildos for ass and mouth.
by sukebe November 18, 2006

The Urban Dictionary Mug

Lotsa space for your liquids.

Buy the mug

The Urban Dictionary Mug

Lotsa space for your liquids.

Buy the mug

The Urban Dictionary Mug

Your favorite word on a white mug.

Create a mug

The Urban Dictionary Mug

One side has the word, one side has the definition. Microwave and dishwasher safe. Lotsa space for your liquids.

Buy the mug

The Urban Dictionary T-Shirt

Soft and offensive. Just like you.

Buy the t-shirt

The Urban Dictionary T-Shirt

Smooth, soft, slim fit American Apparel shirt. Custom printed. 100% fine jersey cotton, except for heather grey (90% cotton).

Buy the t-shirt
1) A fake, rubber penis used by women to mastribate.
2) A slang term for penis.
3) A stupid person.
1) She used a dildo during mastribation.
2) His dildo is seven inches long.
3) Krysti is such a dildo!

The Urban Dictionary Mug

Lotsa space for your liquids.

Buy the mug

The Urban Dictionary Mug

Lotsa space for your liquids.

Buy the mug

The Urban Dictionary Mug

Your favorite word on a white mug.

Create a mug

The Urban Dictionary Mug

One side has the word, one side has the definition. Microwave and dishwasher safe. Lotsa space for your liquids.

Buy the mug

The Urban Dictionary T-Shirt

Soft and offensive. Just like you.

Buy the t-shirt

The Urban Dictionary T-Shirt

Smooth, soft, slim fit American Apparel shirt. Custom printed. 100% fine jersey cotton, except for heather grey (90% cotton).

Buy the t-shirt
Mans worst enemy
shes got a dildo... Doesn't say much for me
by Big Fino April 24, 2003

The Urban Dictionary Mug

Lotsa space for your liquids.

Buy the mug

The Urban Dictionary Mug

Lotsa space for your liquids.

Buy the mug

The Urban Dictionary Mug

Your favorite word on a white mug.

Create a mug

The Urban Dictionary Mug

One side has the word, one side has the definition. Microwave and dishwasher safe. Lotsa space for your liquids.

Buy the mug

The Urban Dictionary T-Shirt

Soft and offensive. Just like you.

Buy the t-shirt

The Urban Dictionary T-Shirt

Smooth, soft, slim fit American Apparel shirt. Custom printed. 100% fine jersey cotton, except for heather grey (90% cotton).

Buy the t-shirt
Cartman's Cat in South Park
Cartman: Mom, Kitty's being a dildo!!!
Carman's Mom: Then I know a certain little kitty kitty who's sleeping with mommy tonight.
by Fonzeh July 27, 2004

The Urban Dictionary Mug

Lotsa space for your liquids.

Buy the mug

The Urban Dictionary Mug

Lotsa space for your liquids.

Buy the mug

The Urban Dictionary Mug

Your favorite word on a white mug.

Create a mug

The Urban Dictionary Mug

One side has the word, one side has the definition. Microwave and dishwasher safe. Lotsa space for your liquids.

Buy the mug

The Urban Dictionary T-Shirt

Soft and offensive. Just like you.

Buy the t-shirt

The Urban Dictionary T-Shirt

Smooth, soft, slim fit American Apparel shirt. Custom printed. 100% fine jersey cotton, except for heather grey (90% cotton).

Buy the t-shirt
A penis shaped sex toy inserted into a woman's vagina for the purpose of masturbating. Originally derived from the common practice of women using large cucumbers to pleasure themselves. As in "dill" pickle or cucumber. "Doe" as in ananymous or a "john doe". Hence, dildo.

Also can mean a very dorky, nerdy, gay or annoying person.
She used her dildo every night while her husband John was out of town.

Everyone thought of Paul as a total dildo after he began reporting students who were smoking on campus.
by sirvancealott October 15, 2005

The Urban Dictionary Mug

Lotsa space for your liquids.

Buy the mug

The Urban Dictionary Mug

Lotsa space for your liquids.

Buy the mug

The Urban Dictionary Mug

Your favorite word on a white mug.

Create a mug

The Urban Dictionary Mug

One side has the word, one side has the definition. Microwave and dishwasher safe. Lotsa space for your liquids.

Buy the mug

The Urban Dictionary T-Shirt

Soft and offensive. Just like you.

Buy the t-shirt

The Urban Dictionary T-Shirt

Smooth, soft, slim fit American Apparel shirt. Custom printed. 100% fine jersey cotton, except for heather grey (90% cotton).

Buy the t-shirt
Free Daily Email

Type your email address below to get our free Urban Word of the Day every morning!

Emails are sent from daily@urbandictionary.com. We'll never spam you.

×