Yawn deafness

A condition where, at the peak of a big yawn, one suffers a few seconds of deafness due to the opening and closing of the eustachian tubes connecting the ear and throat. Opportunists who know of another's yawn deafness use this condition to say something to the person yawning that they don't want them to hear - usually an insult, but spoken under breath or in a normal conversational tone. Better practice is to do it with friends present who will all hear what you said. A sizeable yawn can open up a good 5 seconds of deafness opportunity.

NOTE: Not everyone suffers yawn deafness, so there is always a risk when you try it on someone new.

Ken: Man ... that was a hard day's work (starts yawning)

Fred: I came twice in your wife's arse last night.

Ken: (finishes yawning) Sorry - yawn deafness ... what was that?

Fred: Nothing ... I was just agreeing with you. Hard day indeed.

Yawn deafness by TMA-1 December 20, 2008

Ipod Deafness Syndrome 

Deafness caused by an ipod blaring in one's ear. Often really, really, annoying and occasionally provokes anger.

Jake "Dude, where's the food?"

-silence-

Jake " wheres the &*&4 food!"

Rick "don't bother dude, he's got Ipod Deafness Syndrome.

Jake "oh."

Ipod Deafness Syndrome by KrispeKream February 23, 2010

deafie

Person who is deaf, acceptable slang used within the deaf community.

900 deafies went to the deaf rave.

deafie by Kerb November 28, 2004

Cell-U-Lar Onset Deafness 

When parents are trying to call their teenagers to tell them that it is time to come home and the teenager for some apparent reason does hear the cell phone ring so that they can stay out longer with their friends.

While trying to call my son to tell him that he is out past his curfew and needs to come home, he contracted

Cell-U-Lar Onset Deafness, and does not hear the phone call from his mom.

Cell-U-Lar Onset Deafness by peaceangel22 June 29, 2011

Deafist

A person who discriminates against a person who is hearing impaired or deaf.

Person A: "I hate it when they leave the closed captioning on the TV."

Person B: "Dude, you're such a Deafist"

Deafist by FUELLER77 November 4, 2009

Domestic deafness 

A condition similar to that of domestic blindness, again usually affecting the males of the household. Largely effects teenagers also. It is when someone repeats themself over and over and the other party does not respond. It's like talking to a brick wall!

Domestic deafness is when a wife gently asks her husband: "Darling, can you please put on some washing?

Male: No response, (most likely staring at the football game).
"... darling?"
"...darling?"
"OI YOU!"

Finally a response: "Oh! Sorry. What?"

Related terms are talking to a brick wall, speaking into thin air, i've been a-knocking but no-one's home, or the lights are on but no-one's home

Domestic deafness by Shellruby December 29, 2008

YouTube Deafness 

Temporary hearing loss attributed to watching a low-quality, quiet video on YouTube with poor audio then switching to a video that is louder with better audio quality.

Usually only applies when the victim is wearing headphones due to the unexpected blast of sound that comes with switching videos.

Person 1: Oh man I cant hear anything right now. I was watching a quiet music video on YouTube and I switched to a loud one and it blew out my eardrums man!

Person 2: Yeah man that's called YouTube Deafness. It has happened to me too. Just wait a couple of minutes and it will clear right up.

YouTube Deafness by Anigav Senip July 27, 2010