Top Definition
A magical place where it is rumored that learning takes place, although to those who enter it is often described differently afterward, as a beatiful land in which beer flows in amber currents next to a golden pasture, where virgins lie naked with gentle smiles upon their calm, inviting faces; but more precisely, a Shangri-La rite of passage into adulthood which involves rampant consumption of alcoholic beverages, flagrant and promiscuous sexual behavior, and a general and fundamental disregard for any form of responsibility by its habitants.
Thank you sir, may I have another?
by Phlagellum September 23, 2003
An alternative to buying a Ferrari (they cost about the same).
Damn, that Ferrari costs almost as much as college.
by Duesey December 01, 2003
A highly overated pyramid scheme in which, in exchange for four+ years of your life, you get financially raped by the school bookstore, tuition office, and the american educational system. And as a bonus you get a piece of paper called a 'Duh-Gree' which you pin to your shirt so potential employers will know why you are so stupid.
EMPLOYER: So why do want to work here?
EX-STUDENT: Because I went to college, and therefore I am entitled to a high paying job.
EMPLOYER: Of course. I think you will do well with us. Here is a corner cubicle where you'll spend the rest of your life complaining about why you never get a raise and dropouts are making more than you.
EX-STUDENT: Sounds great! The job world isn't so hard after all.
by m1z_w1z_11 September 01, 2005
Consumer fraud.
Educators don't think of students as purchasers of a service (customers)
by anonymous March 03, 2004
Supposedly the best years of your life. More accurately, a hellhole that knows no mercy and loves to beat you down and make you feel worthless. (See UC Berkeley)
College is supposed to be the best years of my life. I now want to kill myself if these are the "best" years.
by The Last Great American Liberal October 31, 2003
A place where you apply to go learn a ton of shit you won't use in your desired profession. Seriously, why the fuck does someone pursuing a major in biology need to take psychology and western civilization courses?

When applying to 4-year-colleges, remember this: they only give a shit about your GPA and SAT scores. So if you're an overacheiving jock in 12th grade with no morals and a lengthy disciplinary history who likes to get drunk and fuck whores on the weekend, then you're more likely to get into a 4-year-college than someone with values who went to a community college that has a 2.65 GPA and an SAT score around 1000. Or, if your family is rich, it doesn't matter how shitty your grades in high school are, you can even get into Harvard if daddy is willing to make a "donation".

If you are somehow able to get into a 4-year-school but don't look like Brad Pitt, you probably won't get laid, unless you can find a girl that is drunk enough.
Going to college and flushing $40,000 down the toilet are the same thing, basically.
by smiter_of_faggotry December 30, 2004
a $20,000 cover charge for 18-21 year olds
I was drunk my first semester at college.
by wjs June 19, 2003
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